Love Will Tear Us Apart
by Kat.Bites
Summary: Fate: We don't belong together, but we sure seem like we do. MY CHEMICAL ROMANCE.
1. prolague

**PROLAUGUE**

"What were you thinking?" Mrs. Rogers was in a rage. "How can you honestly be doing this to us? We are your family Kayla and you're abandoning us!"

"No I'm not mom." Kayla said. She found it hard to keep her voice even as tears filled her eyes. Kayla thought this would go differently. Leaving was not supposed to be this hard. The bus was supposed to pull up, she was going to come downstairs with her bags, and open the door. She was going to explain everything with the help of the guys. Frank promised her they would help. But now they were standing in the open door, silenced by the fury of Kayla's mother.

Naturally, you're wondering why Mrs. Rogers is so upset. Well it is one hell of a story. Kayla Rogers is 15 and lives in total hell. Her parents are going through a wicked divorce, and her dad is an asshole. Kayla's mother has some anger issues, but can normally keep them under control, but it is those times that she can't that can make the roof blow off. Kayla is probably the most die-hard My Chemical Romance fan you will ever meet. She spends all her money on merch, only listens to their music, and will punch the lights out on anyone who disses them. Her parents have accepted at this point that they can't sway her from her obsession, and just let her go on and do whatever she wants. But this time, she took it to far.

Kayla sent a letter to MCR's fanmail address one night when her father was being particularly asshole-y to her and her mother. She asked them to come and take her away. She didn't care if it was for a week, a month, or forever, she just begged them for help. She left them her cell phone number and was shocked to have received a phone call from Frank Iero, the bands rhythm guitarist, a few days later.

"Hello?" Kayla picked up the phone.

"Yeah, um, is this Kayla Rogers?" said a man's voice on the other end.

"Yes who is this?" Kayla was curious, she didn't get random calls on her cell phone.

"Oh this is frank Iero, you know, from my chemical romance?" replied the man

"Oh my god" Kayla almost dropped the phone, but regained herself enough to continue.

"ha ha, yeah. So we got your fanmail..." Frank's voice trailed off.

"Oh you did? Well, I...I feel weird now...I don't know if I should have..." now Kayla was nervous. what if they thought she was crazy?

"Stop, stop its okay Kayla. So, you want us to come for you or not? Because we will. Say the word and we will." Frank's voice comforted her and she thought of a date.

"Wow, um, okay. Can you come, this weekend? Saturday?" She crossed her fingers and waited for his response.

"Saturday works. the five of us will see you on Saturday. You sent us your address so we'll be there just fine okay?" Frank's voice took on an almost annoyed tone right there.

"yes, okay, sure. I'll be ready. but I might need some help explaining this to my parents..." then it hit her. Kayla's parents would never allow this. she decided to not say anything until they showed up.

"We'll take care of everything, don't worry. see you Saturday?"

"Saturday." Kayla was happy. She was getting out. she heard frank hang up on the other end and ran upstairs to pack.

Saturday came and Kayla spent all day in her room, making up the sequence in her head

_-MCR shows up  
__-I come downstairs with bag  
__-mom say WTF  
__-guys explain  
__-I leave  
__-I'm happy...?_

It seemed so simple, totally foolproof. Nothing was going to go wrong. Of this she was sure. Then Kayla looked out her window and saw a big bus pull up; a tour bus. Kayla couldn't believe they had actually come to get her. She jumped off her bed, grabbed her suitcase and ran downstairs just in time to see her mother open the door to the five boys of My Chemical Romance, dressed in black and covered in eyeliner, standing at the door. Kayla almost laughed at the sight of her mother's face as she let the five boys in, but stopped herself as mocking her mother wouldn't maker her any more willing to let her leave. Kayla came the rest of the way down the stairs and into the living room, dragging her suitcase behind her. When her mother saw this she realized what was going on and her face twisted in rage. Kayla didn't think she'd ever seen her mother so angry.

"What were you thinking?" Mrs. Rogers asked in little more than a whisper. "How can you honestly be doing this to us? We are your family Kayla and you're abandoning us!"

"No I'm not mom." Kayla said. She found it hard to keep her voice even as tears filled her eyes. Kayla thought this would go differently. Leaving was not supposed to be this hard.

"mom, I don't belong here. Everything I do is wrong to you and I just can't deal with it anymore. I'm going with the guys and you can't stop me." Kayla's mother came right up to her and grabbed her by the shoulders. Kayla felt her mother's long manicured nails dig themselves into her skin. Her mother began to shake her violently.

"you listen to me Kayla Jean Rogers, you are my daughter and you will do what I tell you! Do you hear me?" she shook her harder. "DO YOU HEAR ME?" at this point Ray came over and tried to pry Kayla from her hysterical mother's grip. Mrs. Rogers began to cry as she slowly let go, realizing that shaking her around wasn't going to do a thing. Kayla watched stone faced as her mother crumpled in a shuddering, sobbing heap on the floor at her feet. Kayla stepped around the crumpled heap of suburban perfection and against the waiting arm of Gerard. He wrapped his arm around her and just said

"everything's gonna be fine Kayla, we've gotcha now. Don't worry." and for once, she didn't. For once Kayla just let everything lose and put herself into Gerard's hands. because she knew he was right, everything was going to be fine.


	2. Chapter 1

_welcome to the first fanfic i ever wrote. it's based on events i tried to start. Kayla's letter is real, written by me. everything else is a pure fabrication of what was supposed to happen._

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**CHAPTER 1**

As Kayla watched her house get smaller and smaller, her head against the dark tinted window, she felt bad about how happy she was. As much as it hurt, she was glad that she didn't have to deal with her parents every day. At least until MCR sent her home...NO! Kayla clenched her eyes shut and banged her head lightly against the back of the chair _Don't think about it being over, don't think about it being over. The more you think about it the faster it comes. _she thought to herself. _You are with your favorite band of all time and you didn't even have to take them hostage to do it. Go over to them and take advantage of this already!_ Kayla got up and walked to the front of the bus where Gerard, Mikey, and Bob were sitting. Ray and Frank were sleeping in their respective bunks in the far back. She sat down and stared at her chipping black nail polished fingers, tangled together in her lap. She started cracking her knuckles and Mikey winced. She looked up at him apologized quietly and went back to staring at her nails. Suddenly she felt three pairs of eyes boring into her. Half of her brain kept telling her to look up, say something, stop being such a brick in the wall,and the other half of her brain fought it, too afraid of saying something stupid and looking like a dork. Eventually, the "look up!" side of her brain won, but the "stay down!" side fought, so _pick up your head and ask where we're going_ was what she wanted to do, but what she ended up doing was snapping her head up, causing a loud crack in her neck and when she looked up and realized again who she was talking to, said

"Swergwegon?" _Swergwegon? Congratulations Kayla, they think you're a Viking._ Kayla scrunched up her face as Frankie quickly stifled a snigger.

"Oh crap, sorry" Frank said "I so did not mean to do that, I know this has to be weird."

"Yeah a little" said Kayla. "I'm so happy you guys got me though, I don't know how long I would have lasted in there. I swear I love you guys." at this point, Kayla abandoned all fear of dorkyness. Frank seemed just as uncomfortable as she was, and that gave her a slight confidence boost.

"Well, you know why we came out here don't you?" asked Mikey, speaking for the first time. "We couldn't just leave you there after all the stuff you said"

"Yeah" added Gerard. "I'm sure there are a lot of girls who would want us to come get THEM, but you're the only one with the guts to come to us and ask for it. Come on, we read that and how could we have NOT come?" He put his hand on her arm "Look at me." He pulled her face up by her chin, forcing her to meet his eyes, she nearly melted. _"Can one person be this handsome?"_ Kayla wondered. She was one of the tons and tons of girls on this planet with a monster crush on Gerard Way. She met his eyes and he smiled at her. But his eyes, why did they have to be so sharp? They carved through her brain like knives, as if reading her thoughts.

"You. Are. Not. A. Geek. We. Do. Not. Find. You. At. All. Strange." he said every word as its own sentence, so she would understand he meant it. She looked away, his eyes were almost scaring her now. It was like being X-rayed. She was careful to look anywhere but at Gerard, but still he held her chin and demanded her attention.

"Kayla? Kayla do you understand me? This is your home now. With us. You aren't going home until you want to go home alright?" He raised his eyebrows at her expecting an answer.

_how the hell did he know that was what I was worried about?_ she thought, it was like he could read her every thought, just from looking her in the eye.

"Kayla, when do you want to go back? Do you want to at all?" Kayla swallowed hard, as glad as she was to be out, never going back seemed like a hard concept all of a sudden. But she didn't want to go home. Visits maybe, but she never wanted to call that suburban hell a home again. She took a deep breath and looked Gerard in those sharp deep eyes and said

"I...I never, ever, want to go back there again. Never. Ever. I want to stay with you." she closed her eyes and fought back a few unwelcome tears. Gerard nodded and said

"Okay. Then you never ever have to." He put a hand on each of her shoulders, and Kayla tensed up, remembering that moment with her mother. He felt her muscles tense and let go, taking her hands instead.

"You're never going back. Unless you change your mind. But until that happens, your with us, I promise you this now." and slowly he pulled her hand onto his chest, over his heart. "I promise." and at that moment the bus slowed to a stop, and they had arrived at Mikey and Gerard's house in Belleville.


	3. Chapter 2

**CHAPTER 2**

Kayla stepped off the bus with her suitcase and onto the sidewalk in front of a split-level house. The front lawn was a perfect green, not a leaf to be seen, even though it was fall and the orange and brown leaves were on the ground every where else. She followed behind Mikey, Ray, and Frank up to the front door, which Mikey unlocked. She followed them in with Bob and Gerard right behind her. Bob closed the door behind him and the house was plunged into darkness. Frank and Ray rushed to turn on lights and Kayla saw why it was so dark. The walls were all dark colors. The room she was in was a dark hunter green with a brown carpet, beyond that she could see blue walls, brown walls, even purple walls. This darkness sort of made her uncomfortable, and was glad for what Gerard said next.

"Don't get too comfortable, we're only here for about three days. We go out to tour again for the next two months. You up for that Kayla?" he turned to her and she suddenly remembered that MCR is almost constantly on tour.

"Yes I can handle that Gerard. I used to go on huge road trips with my dad. The longest ride I ever took in a car was 16 hours, Orlando to Ridgewood." She stood there realizing she was showing off a little, but didn't mind much.

"Wow, okay then you're good." said Gerard, impressed.

"Hey, Kayla" said Bob, interrupting "let me show you where you're crashing." Bob led Kayla through more rooms that you would have expected to see in the house. It looked so small from the front, but it was really a large maze of room after room after room until they came to a small flight of stairs. Down they walked past a room with wooden walls, full of action figures and art posters that was no doubt Gerard's room. Down the hallway a little further and she saw a room with a washer and dryer, and then...

"Oh no way." the last room was a light purple, it hurt Kayla's eyes after all the darkness of the rest of the house. There were butterfly string lights over a big mirror, a disco lamp in the corner, and a pretty white dresser and desk. There were flowers painted all over both the walls and furniture that were no doubt painted by Gerard. There was a queen sized four poster bed in one corner with a white canopy hanging over it.

"Um...I think Gerard tried to make this room girl friendly for you." said Bob, noticing the open-mouthed look on Kayla's face.

"I can see that..." she said finally.

"Well, why don't you get settled" said Bob, "or at least...as settled as you can be in a room like this. And I'll be upstairs with the guys, come up when you're ready okay?"

"Sure, I'll be up in a few." said Kayla, coming the rest of the way into the room. Bob went upstairs and as soon as she heard his footsteps fade she kicked off her shoes and jumped off the bed, crying and laughing at the same time. She didn't care how 6-year-old the room was, point was Gerard tried, and that was all that mattered.


	4. Chapter 3

**CHAPTER 3**

When Kayla was through jumping on the bed, getting all her happy energy out the bed was really messed up. She slid onto the floor and began straightening the sheets and blankets as she sang "Demolition Lovers" to herself. While she did this, Gerard walked in and stood in the doorway.

"When I said make yourself comfortable I didn't mean for you to trash the room." Kayla turned around, startled at his voice.

"Oh, sorry." she replied, smiling sheepishly, "Couldn't resist, got a lot of happy energy!" she balanced on the balls of her feet to prove her hyperness.

"Ha ha it's okay. Now that I'm looking at this room with you in it, I realize I girl-ed it up a little too much huh?" Gerard walked in and ran his hand along the lavender wall. "I just wanted you to be comfortable"

"I couldn't care less really.," said Kayla, sitting on the edge of the bed and surveying the room, with an attempt at a real smile on her face. _She really did care._ "No one's ever done anything this nice for me before." _That's gonna make him not feel bad right?"_

"Alright, I believe you, and you're welcome," said Gerard, as Kayla opened her mouth to thank him. _How the hell does he do that?_

"So." he said "You like "Demolition Lovers"? He asked.

"I LOVE that song. It's so, sad. But so pretty at the same time. It's what I would listen to when I couldn't sleep. It's my lullaby." she replied. Gerard nodded.

"Well, goodnight Kayla. Wake up whenever the hell you feel like it, we all will. If you're up first, whatever, help yourself to the fridge okay?" said Gerard turning to leave.

"Oh, Gerard?" Kayla said, right before he left.

"Yeah Kayla?"

"Thank you. For everything, even the room. It means more than you know."

"No problem, just do me one favor?" he said

"Anything." said Kayla, smiling.

"You're with MCR now, call me Gee okay?" he said, winking.

"Okay." said Kayla breathlessly. Gerard left and Kayla collapsed on the bed with a soft moan, hand over her quickly beating heart. Had Gerard Way really just asked her to call him by a nickname? Use a term of endearment? A friend-to-friend name? Could she have dreamed that? No, it had really happened. She was somehow sure of that. And God did it feel right.

The next morning Kayla went upstairs and into the kitchen. It was small, just enough room for five or six people. She saw a counter attached to a sink and stove, a refrigerator stood at the end of the counter. At the end of this little three-sided square was a table with six mismatched chairs, four of which were filled up by Ray, Mikey, Bob, and Frank. Mikey and Frank were fighting over the box of Captain Crunch cereal, Bob and Ray just sat there laughing and eating their own breakfasts.

"Give it to me Frank I had it first!" said Mikey, sounding four years old.

"No way Mikey, I did. Back the hell off my Captain Crunch!" responded Frank in an equally immature tone.

"Is this how mornings usually go?" asked Kayla, coming up behind them and grabbing the box for herself. Frank and Mikey looked at her, surprised she was able to do it with such ease.

"No, believe me, this is a boring morning for us." said Ray. "Normally our mornings involve Mikey's high-pitched girlish screams from either Gerard or Frank scaring the shit out of him.

"Cant wait to see that." said Kayla, amused at the thought of waking up to a man's screams at the hands of his brother and best friend. As if on cue, Gerard came up the stairs in a black t-shirt and green plaid flannel pajama pants. His hair was tangled and messy, but still perfect. _Was he BORN beautiful? _thought Kayla. Then she looked down and realized something. She and Gerard were wearing the same pants. She looked at his pants, he looked at hers, and she just shrugged and said

"Oops. Ha ha. Wonder how that happened. Ha ha," Gerard smiled, laughed a little, then put his hands on his hips and smiled wider, deciding to mess around a little.

"Bitch! How dare you have the same outfit as me?! You social outcast!" he said in a rich-bitch valley girl voice. Kayla decided to play along, for lack of anything better to do.

"Oh gosh, oh gosh! I...I don't know what I was thinking!" she laughed, bent down and began to pretend to kiss his feet. He turned up his nose and put up his right hand in a "talk to the hand manner"

"Ugh! Bitch, I am from BEVERLY HILLS! Do not. TALK to me." she got up, and they both collapsed into each other, unable to hold in the laughter any longer. They supported each other's bodies as they laughed hysterically. Then she said

"Gee you Valley girl bitch!"

"Kayla you social outcast fashion victim" he said, chocking for air. Frank, Ray, Mikey, and Bob just watched, one eyebrow raised per face, jaws down. When they finally broke apart and sat down, wiping tears from their eyes Ray finally said

"These two are getting TOO MUCH sleep and not enough brain food. They are totally insane."

"Okay to business." said Frank "We leave to start the tour in, what? Four days? Yeah, four days. So we're all ready for that right?" Five "ready" s followed.  
"Then off we shall go, on another traveling circus that is a My Chemical Romance tour. Screaming girls, signing autographs, mosh pits, EMS teams, hot arenas, microphone squeals. God I love the music biz" said Frank, raising his glass of orange juice. Five more glasses went up and they all did cheers. Kayla was ecstatic.


	5. Chapter 4

**CHAPTER 4**

Four days went by surprisingly quickly. Kayla was happier during those four days than she could ever remember being in her life. She couldn't remember ever smiling as wide as she was now, or laughing as hard. She had bonded so much with the guys in such a short time, and was feeling especially close to Gee. He was one of the first people she saw in the mornings now, and the last person she said goodnight to, and of course, the one on her mind all night. Kayla knew how wrong it was to have a crush on him when they lived in the same house, but she couldn't help it. She wanted to stop, and have Gee be a brother not a crush, but it was harder than it sounded. She decided to ignore it completely and just see how things went. So on the morning of their fifth day at Gee and Mikey's house they were up so early Kayla wondered if she'd slept at all. They'd been up the night before partying it up with a few 6-packs. They all knew she was underage, but who was going to tell? But she had the worst headache. She came upstairs still in her pajamas, with her bag behind her. She came into the front den to see Ray coming through the door to get more bags. She could see Gee, Mikey, Bob, and Frank loading up the bus outside.

"God, you look terrible." said Ray, half smiling at the sight of the hung-over Kayla.

"Shut up Ray." she said, well, growled. Just then, Gee came in the room, looking about as hung-over as she was. He ran to her, arms outstretched.

"Awwwwww Kayla couldn't handle the booooooze. I should have knoooown. Are you okay?" He put his hand on her forehead, without a real purpose. She didn't mind. The warmth of his skin against her made her feel better instantly.

"I'm okay. Once we get going, I'll be fine. Don't worry about me Gee." she took his wrist and pulled it away from her head, looking into his eyes with her sunken bloodshot eyes. He gave her another unsure look, then turned and grabbed her bag.

"On the bus, you sleep. Hear me? You need to sleep this off. I feel stupid now for letting you drink but I wasn't really thinking. So you do what I tell you to get rid of the hangover you hear me?" he said, suddenly stern. Kayla had never seen Gee like this, and knew she shouldn't make a remark, he seemed really serious. She nodded, not very much, as her head was ready to split open.

"Okay, okay. Whatever you say...Gerard" this was a different Gerard, he wasn't Gee. So she wasn't going to call him that when he was like this. She hoped that would never happen. He took her by the hand and led her to the bus, despite her words.

"Gerard I'm not that hung-over I can walk myself." she said. he wouldn't let go. he put a hand to her back as she climbed up into the bus. She went and sat on her bunk, top bunk, across from Gerard, who was above Mikey. She was above Ray. Frank and Bob were next to Mikey and Gerard. She tried to get back off the bus to help load, but Gee wouldn't let her. So she sat and watched from the table in the front of the bus instead. When all was loaded up the boys came into the bus and sat with Kayla. As it pulled away they laughed and cheered and toasted to a great tour with invisible drinks. Smacking hands instead of glasses. Frank pulled out a permanent marker and said

"Whose the victim this time?" he said, looking at each of them.

"KAYLA, KAYLA, KAYLA, KAYLA" said Mikey in a low voice, hands cupped around his mouth. Ray and Bob joined in, stomping their feet. Kayla was confused, and looked to Gerard for help. He silenced the guys, so he could explain.

"Okay, so every time we go back out to tour after being home, one of us has to sacrifice a pair of pants, preferably jeans, and we all get to draw all over them. While the owner of said jeans is still wearing them." he said, very matter-of-factly. "Its more fun than it sounds" he added at her surprised face. "So, wanna be the victim?" he asked.

"Sounds good to me!" she added smiling. _How bad could it be?_ she thought. She went into the back and put on a pair of faded jeans. She came back out and was immediately attacked by the guys and their markers. She could feel the tips all over her legs, but couldn't really see what they were writing. There was laughter, there was shoving, until all of a sudden she felt a tip of a marker close in on her butt! She had Gee on one side, Frank on the other. Ray stopped what he was doing and surveyed the ass art. All of a sudden they all broke out in laughter, and she ran to the mirror to see what they had done. She looked at her backside in the mirror and saw scribbled on the left side of her butt "Frank Iero owns Kayla's left ass cheek" and on the right in different handwriting... "But Gerard owns the right one!" She herself burst out in laughter. She ran out and pounded playfully at Frank's chest laughing like crazy. When things died down they all sat/laid spread-eagled across random areas of the bus, someone occasionally letting out a chuckle. Gerard snapped up when he heard his cell phone ring.

"Its Olivia!" he said, a huge smile on his face, "I'm gonna take this in the back okay guys?" off he walked to where he could talk to his girlfriend by himself. Kayla stayed where she was, not much interested in listening in. But soon it became hard not to. It seemed Gee was pacing. Coming closer to her, then backing away. His voice became sad, he seemed to be frustrated, she snuck closer to where he was to listen in. When she heard what he was saying she almost left, not wanting to intrude. But she stayed, curiosity taking over. She could barely see Gerard, but what she saw was him pacing, rubbing his eyes, and running his fingers through his hair.

"But, Olivia, sweetie, I'll be back before you know it! And I'll call you every day! I've been out on tour before and you've been fine with it, baby what's so different now? he paused, listening to her response. When he spoke again his voice was rather shaky.

"Well, yeah I guess I understand. Yeah, okay, bye..." he turned off the phone and sank down the wall to the floor. He put his head in his hands and began to shake as he cried. Kayla quietly walked over.

"What happened Gee?" she asked quietly, standing near him. He looked up, face shining,

"my girlfriend...ex girlfriend now I guess...she doesn't want to deal with worrying about me while I'm on tour. She's been okay before what happened this time? What did I do wrong?" Kayla slid down next to him and put her head on his shoulder.

"I don't know Gee. I just don't know." she really was confused. Who would break up with a guy like Gee?

"I...I thought I was making her happy. I thought she was okay with me not always being there. I...I loved her and I thought she loved me..." at this point Gerard couldn't talk anymore and just sobbed. Kayla put her arms around him and he hugged her back, collapsing into her and crying into her shoulder. All she could think of to say was

"Its okay Gee, everything's going to be fine, don't worry. Everything's going to be fine, you'll be okay." she stroked his hair, and felt like the world was crashing down around her. She didn't know he could be like this. It didn't scare her, or upset her, she just never would have believed anyone who were to tell her he had acted this way. He sighed and answered

"No I wont Kayla. No I wont. This will never ever be okay. Why Kayla? Why do I miss her so much already?" Kayla didn't answer. She just held Gee there and let him cry.


	6. Chapter 5

**CHAPTER 5**

Kayla was awoken at close to 12:30 in the morning by her cell phone. She crept quietly out of her bunk and grabbed it before the guys could wake up. She turned it on before she could look at the number, and whispered

"Hello?"

"Kayla? Kayla is that you? Kayla are you there darling?" her mother shouted from the other end.

"Mom?" said Kayla, perplexed. What was she doing calling her so early? And why was she shouting?

"Kayla, Kayla this is your mother. I-I-I want you to come home." suddenly Kayla realized...her mother was drunk. "I want you to come home, and we'll pretend none of this ever happened. I-I'll raise your allowance, I'll buy you all new clothes from that store you like to much...what's it called? Hop Toxic?"

"HOT TOPIC mom. and NO. I will not come home. I'm happy here with Gerard and Mikey and Ray and Frank and Bob. I'm not coming back home. Not ever." for some reason, Kayla was having no trouble saying this to her mother. But then Mrs. Rogers got angry.

"Kayla Jean Rogers, you will do as I tell you! You are my daughter and if I tell you you're coming home, YOU'RE COMING HOME! And I don't care weather you want to or not! One way or another, you are coming home. Goodbye Kayla Jean." the phone went dead as her mother hung up. _One way or another, you're coming home. Weather you want to or not._ Why did those words scare Kayla so much? Her mother was crazy drunk, she didn't mean a word she said. _She's bluffing Kayla, she cant get you home. Gerard promised. Come on girl calm down! _No matter how hard she forced herself to be okay, Kayla still sat and cried. When all the tears were out Kayla went back to bed, drained and afraid.

When Kayla woke up that morning, she was blinded by the bright October sun coming through the shade. She sad up to shield her eyes, and found herself back in her bed...in her parent's house. Kayla went stone cold. She laid back down, closed her eyes and tried to convince herself she was still on the bus...but every time she sat back up she was still there. In her room. Soon she heard a crash. She went downstairs and saw utter chaos. Food pulled out of its cabinets and onto the floor, glasses and plates broken all around her feet, vases and books thrown from the shelves, the TV on the floor with a huge hole in the middle, as if someone had punched or kicked it. And she heard screaming. Her parents. They were throwing things at each other. Heavy things. She ran in and screamed for them to stop...and then they turned on her. Her father said,

"HER! This is all her fault! Little Miss My Chemical Romance doom and gloom. Spending all our money on music and band merchandise. Everything is her fault! If it wasn't for Kayla, we'd be alright!" He chucked the book he was holding at Kayla and she ducked, it barely missed her head. He picked up a piece of fallen broken curtain rod and threw that too. Soon her mother joined in and the heavy items flew faster and faster, some hit her and it hurt, but she couldn't scream, she couldn't move anymore...all she saw was her parents coming closer and closer to her...

Kayla's eyes snapped open. She was in pitch darkness, but in the bus. She could feel the bus wobbling beneath her. She closed her eyes and breathed a heavy sigh, and tears flooded out. _I'm okay. I'm still on the bus. C'mon Kayla you're letting mom get to you! Stop crying Kayla, you're okay you big baby!_ But she couldn't stop crying. She kept quiet as she could, but let the tears and uncontrollable sobs come rolling out. Suddenly she heard someone climb up the ladder into her bunk.

"Kayla?" whispered Gerard "Kayla what's the matter? Are you alright?" He crawled into the bed and laid down behind Kayla, wrapping his arms around her. After a few minutes she responded shakily.

"You-you-you sent me home. You-you-you sent me home to my parents. You-you-you...you didn't send me home right?" Kayla suddenly felt very stupid. Waking Gerard up because of a stupid nightmare. Gerard tightened his embrace slightly.

"No no no no no. You're still here Kayla see? I'm here. I'm right here beside you I promise. You can hear me right? You can feel me right?" Kayla pushed her back into his chest, testing his solidity.

"Yeah, you're there. I just-I just, mom said to me on the phone that she was going to get me home one way or another...and I'm so afraid of what she's gonna do..."

"Is that what's bothering you?" said Gerard, surprised. "You're mom called and made an empty threat to bring you home? C'mon honey I'm not gonna let that happen you know that! C'mon you're one of us now and we're not letting you go."

"Are you sure? Do you mean it?" Kayla needed to be sure he wasn't just making her feel better, she needed to know he really meant it.

"Kayla Jean Rogers, what do I have to do to make you realize I really mean every word I say?" _There he goes again! Like he's reading my mind!_ thought Kayla. This didn't make her feel better at all. She took a few deep breaths and said

"Just...hold me. Don't let go, please, don't let me go...Gee I feel so safe when I'm with you. As long as you're with me I'm safe, I'm fine. Just don't..." Kayla stopped, unable to talk anymore, the lump in her throat was closing her airway and she needed to be quiet.

"Okay okay I won't go I promise." said Gerard "Truth is...I'm kind of glad that you're upset. No, not like that!" he said quickly, as Kayla picked up her head at his last words. "See, you didn't wake me up, I wasn't asleep. I was awake thinking about Olivia...and how happy I was to have you to comfort me after that call...I never thanked you for being there did I? Thank you Kayla." Kayla was confused, Gerard was talking to her like she was some kind of godsend.

"Hey it was the least I could do." she said "You saved me remember?"

"No Kayla," responded Gerard "We saved each other." At this, Kayla's stomach was full with the most excited butterflies she had ever felt before. She quelled them, wanting to keep her cool, and shifted, so Gerard's, Gee's arms were all the way around her. She held his hands and laced her fingers with his. He stroked the back of her hands with his thumbs and began to sing, softly into her hair.

"hand in mine into your icy blues..."

"Gee?" Kayla interrupted him "Are you gonna leave once I fall asleep?"

"Why the hell would I do that?" he replied, perplexed. Kayla went red at the thought of what she was going to say next.

"Because if you stay, when everyone wakes up and sees you up here they're gonna think something happened. And you'd be in so much trouble because I'm 15." Gerard laughed softly.

"Oh, they won't think that. Believe me, ff I'd had a turn at you, they'd know." he said, a big smile in his voice. "I tend to have that...effect." Kayla pushed playfully into him again and said

"Ugh, Gee you egotistical little..." her voice trailed off, as she found herself completely incapable of calling Gerard a mean name. She just couldn't do it. "Okay, not leaving right?"

"Not leaving." he said. Kayla paused and said

"Good." and Gerard held her tightly and sang again.

"Hand in mine, into your icy blues" and Kayla closed her eyes and smiled in the arms of the greatest person she'd ever meet.  
_"And then I'd say to you we could take to the highway  
With this trunk of ammunition too  
I'd end my days with you in a hail of bullets_

_I'm trying, I'm trying  
To let you know just how much you mean to me  
And after all the things we put each other through and_

_I would drive on to the end with you  
A liquor store or two keeps the gas tank full  
And I feel like there's nothing left to do  
But prove myself to you and we'll keep it running_

_But this time, I mean it  
I'll let you know just how much you mean to me  
As snow falls on desert sky  
Until the end of everything  
I'm trying, I'm trying  
To let you know how much you mean  
As days fade, and nights grow  
And we go cold_

_Until the end, until this pool of blood  
Until this, I mean this, I mean this  
Until the end of..._

_I'm trying, I'm trying  
To let you know how much you mean  
As days fade, and nights grow  
And we go cold_

_But this time, we'll show them  
We'll show them all how much we mean  
As snow falls on desert sky  
Until the end of every..._

_All we are, all we are  
Is bullets I mean this  
All we are, all we are  
Is bullets I mean this  
All we are, all we are  
Is bullets I mean this_

_All we are, all we are  
Is bullets I mean this_

_As lead rains, will pass on through our phantoms  
Forever, forever  
Like scarecrows that fuel this flame we're burning  
Forever, and ever  
Know how much I want to show you you're the only one  
Like a bed of roses there's a dozen reasons in this gun_

_And as we're falling down, and in this pool of blood  
And as we're touching hands, and as we're falling down  
And in this pool of blood, and as we're falling down  
I'll see your eyes, and in this pool of blood  
I'll meet your eyes, I mean this forever"_


	7. Chapter 6

**CHAPTER 6**

Three days passed after Kayla's nightmare and not another one occurred. She and Gee didn't talk as much as they did before that night, but it seemed like every time she glanced at him he was smiling at her. She was having so much fun, with the concerts. Before she set out with MCR she had only been to one of their shows, and now she was sitting backstage at each and every one of them. One night after a show, they sat on the bus eating McDonald's drive thru food. Frank asked

"So Kayla, when's your birthday?"

"Oh, its April 11th" said Kayla. Gerard spoke next.

"Hey, that's two days after my birthday. We should have a joint party. Unless..." Gee bit a French fry and looked sideways at Frank and Mikey "you want a...SUPER SWEET SIXTEEN!" Frank and Mikey slapped their thighs at once and screamed

"SWEET SIXTEEN!" then they stood up and started singing the theme song to "My Super Sweet Sixteen". They danced around like total idiots and sang off key into invisible microphones. Kayla, Bob, and Gerard all fell to the ground from laughing so hard. When Mikey and Frank had sat back down, Ray looked at his burger and said

"What are they putting in this food?" Bob laughed and said

"C'mon Ray, you watch it too." he said smiling. Ray looked at him, disgusted

"No I don't! I don't think I've ever been so desperately bored that I've watched MTV willingly." Mikey interrupted.

"Well, to change this very interesting subject, I was looking at our tour schedule and it turns out we have three weeks off in December/January. The week before, the week of, and the week after Christmas. I can smell the eggnog now..." his voice trailed off as he licked his lips. Gee laughed and said

"Eggnog is Mikey's luva." Frank snorted with laughter.

"Yeah, his ONLY luva." he said. then Mikey retorted,

"Oh shut up Frank. Everyone knows that when you're not with Jamia, Gee and that dress are all YOU'VE got." Frank crossed his arms.

"Oh, so would you prefer if I just ass-raped you?" Mikey pulled his legs up to his chest and threw a French fry at frank, which he caught in his mouth.

"Eww! Does Jamia know she's engaged to a total homo?" Frank's jaw dropped, but he still smiled

"I'll make you eat those words Michael James Way." Frank stood up and walked towards Mikey, who screamed, stood up, and ran like hell to the back of the bus. Frank followed screaming

"COME BACK HERE YOU PANSY ASS BITCH!" Gerard, Bob, Ray, and Kayla sat there, brows furrowed, mouths open as they heard thuds and grunts coming from the back of the bus. It sounded like Frank was beating the crap out of Mikey. Then Bob spoke.

"Okay, someone help me get the image out of my head of Frankie butt-raping Mikey."

"OH GOD! Now I've got it!" screamed Kayla, clutching her head and bending over.

"MY BRAIN! OH GOD, MY BRAIN!" said Ray, joining Kayla. Gerard laughed as he ate another French fry.

"I'm actually kind of enjoying the image thank you very much. Ha ha no." just then Frank came back into the front, with no visible injuries. Mikey soon followed, puffing on his inhaler like crazy.

"I will get you back for this Iero." Mikey lifted his shirt to reveal a very purple stomach. "This hurts like a bitch and you mark my words you will pay." Mikey fake glared at Frank before busting out in laughter, clutching his stomach. No one was left without a laughter cramp at the thought of Mikey's pitiful revenge.


	8. Chapter 7

**CHAPTER 7**

Two months went by like that and before Kayla could even blink, they were back on the road to Mikey and Gee's house for their three-week break. As soon as they got back to Jersey everyone started celebrating, because the ground was covered in a thick white layer of snow. Kayla was ecstatic, she loved snow, and there had to be four or five inches down and it was still coming! Big white balls of frozen water flew against and stuck to the window by Kayla's face, and she smiled at the thought of having a huge snowball fight with the guys when they got home. They wasted no time. As soon as they pulled up in front of the house they ran in the house with as many bags as they could carry, and ran into their rooms to change into warmer clothes. Kayla put on more layers than she could count so she could stay out all day, and she was last one back outside. She walked out into the big backyard and saw the two teams already building forts.

"KAYLA OVER HERE!" yelled Frank. He was frantically scooping up snow into a pile as Bob molded it into a big wall. Mikey, Gerard, and Ray were doing the same thing maybe twenty feet away for their own wall of protection. Kayla skipped that, she bent down behind the ever growing wall with Frank and Bob and began scooping up huge handfuls of snow. She compacted a ball and chucked it with all her might at Mikey's head protruding over the wall. She hit her target and he fell backward screaming

"I'M HIT! I'M HIT!" he came back up with a ball twice the size of Kayla's and chucked it at her. It missed.

"I am ALL PRO Mikey! Just try and hit me!" screamed Kayla. And he did. Mikey threw four more snowballs and then Ray joined in. Once the wall was big enough Gerard started too. Soon Frank and Bob abandoned the wall and just started throwing snowballs like crazy. Almost an hour past and only Gee and Kayla were left standing. Mikey, Frank, Bob, and Ray lay across the snowy ground, panting heavily. Then Ray said

"All in favor of going inside and making a fire say I" everyone said I, except Gee and Kayla who were too busy throwing snowballs at each other still. They stopped. Gee spoke.

"Fine pansies. Go inside and get all warm. I'll handle Kayla" he said, smiling and throwing another snowball. Kayla ducked and it flew past her, barely grazing her ear.

"Oh you are so going down Gee!" she said, running out from behind the wall. She ran over and shoved some snow in his face. He coughed a little and rubbed it out of his eyes. Kayla turned and ran like hell, but he was faster. Gee caught up and shoved some snow in her hood and pulled it over her head. Kayla screamed. They paid no attention to Bob, Ray, Mikey, and Frank as they walked away, smiling and rolling their eyes at the lovesick pair. Yes, the guys knew what Kayla and Gee were feeling, Kayla and Gee didn't know...at least...not yet.

Gee grabbed Kayla from behind and pulled her to the ground. She pulled him down next to her and began to make a snow angel. Gerard followed suit. When they stood up, the angel's wings just touched one another's. Then Gee went and rolled right over onto Kayla, looking down into her eyes.

"You have...the most beautiful face...I think...I've ever seen." he said, suddenly serious. Kayla smiled, and suddenly knew exactly what to do. She picked her head up out of the snow and kissed him. Only for one second, she kissed him. She plopped her head back down into the cold snow and smiled up at him. He smiled too...and kissed her again. It lasted a few seconds more than the first, and Kayla was much more satisfied when they broke apart. They stayed like that in the snow for what seemed like another hour, until Gee said

"It's freezing. Wanna go inside and warm up?" Kayla nodded and blinked the snowflakes off her eyelashes.

"But you're gonna have to get off me first Gee..." she said smiling.

"Oh! Oh, yeah, I forgot. S-sorry." he said and got up quickly. He reached his hand down and helped her up, brushing the snow off her arms and back. They walked together through the backdoor, hand in hand.

Later that night, Kayla and Gee were the last one's left awake, save for Frank, who was in Gee's room watching TV. Gee and Kayla sat together in a corner of the couch, under a blanket. They sipped hot chocolate as they watched the last embers of the evening's fire burn out. Kayla's head was rested on Gee's chest and he stroked her hair, still a little damp from the snow. She thought about how that kiss said so many things without saying a word. It told Gee how she felt about him, and told her that he felt the same way. She smiled as she turned her head to the side, to feel his warmth against her cheek. Then he touched his finger to her chin, tilting her face up to meet his for another kiss. Oh how she loved to kiss him. He smiled when he kissed her, and his lips were soft like a baby's. She loved this moment, sitting with him in the soft glow of the fire, she wanted to stay like this, and never have to move; never have him move. She knew that couldn't be so, but girls can dream right? What Gee said next made her heart leap.

"So, I never asked you...do you have...any special someone waiting for you back in your town?" she looked at him, eyebrows raised.

"Me? Kayla the emo metal head freak? No, not me." he gave her the cutest puppy face in the world and said

"I don't see any freaks here." he looked around the room and then back at Kayla. "All I see, is the most beautiful girl in the world in so many ways, and the guy who thinks he's in love with her." Kayla's mouth dropped open. She couldn't believe what Gee had just said. Had he said it? She couldn't be sure. Until Gee got nervous.

"Oh, wow...did I just say that? I-wow, I feel kind of stupid now, I mean, its only been a few weeks and-" he stopped, as Kayla put a finger to his lips.

"Shhhhh. It's fine. Because you know what?" she stretched her neck to whisper in his ear. "I think I love you too." she came back down and looked at him, biting her lip. Gee let out a heavy breath, and smiled at her. Then they kissed, who knows how much time went by and they just kissed. But as soon as it began, Frank couldn't take anymore...he turned around and went to his room, unable to watch anymore of the scene.


	9. Chapter 8

**CHAPTER 8**

Frank barely got any sleep that night. Gerard told Kayla he was in love with her? How could that be? She was fifteen, he was twenty-eight! That was thirteen year difference for God's sake! And what about Olivia? Gerard couldn't possibly just have forgotten about her and moved on to Kayla, not that quickly anyway. That morning he stood in the kitchen with Ray, Mikey, and Bob and he told them what he'd seen the night before. Mikey rolled his eyes and said

"Stop and think Frank, maybe Gee just spent a lot of time with Kayla so it took him less time than usual. I mean, it doesn't take all THAT long to fall in love when it's the right person I suppose...we should be happy for Gee and Kayla. I mean, we're all happy for you and Jamia, its only fair you return it for Gee..."

"Mikey's right" said Ray "true love is hard to come by these days, can't you just be happy for them Frank?" said Ray, slightly annoyed. "right Bob?" he asked, turning to Bob. He didn't reply. Bob just sat there, staring off into space as he thought the topic over while taking a spoonful of cereal. Just then, Gerard came up the stairs smiling slightly and walking taller than usual.

"Morning!" he said, beaming at all four of his friends in turn. "Everyone sleep okay?" he asked as he poured himself some orange juice.

"No Gerard I can't say I did." said Frank, putting down his coffee.

"Oh?" said Gee "and why not?" Frank took a deep breath and said

"She's too young for you Gee. End it now before someone gets hurt." Gee looked at Frank, confused and asked

"How did you...you mean you heard...?"

"Yeah Gee I saw you two last night. You don't love her Gerard. Believe me you don't." said Frank, so matter of factly, so calmly it made Gerard furious. Then he spoke in a deathly quiet voice.

"You may be one of my best friends Frank, but you can't tell me who I love and don't love. Just because you found your soul mate in Jamia doesn't mean I can't find mine in Kayla." Frank walked over to Gerard and grabbed his shoulders.

"She's not your soul mate Gee! She's just another fan! The only difference between Kayla and every other girl out there is that you PITTIED this one and pulled her up out of the fray." Gerard grabbed Frank's arms and threw them off.

"Don't talk about Kayla like that! She is not just another desperate fan girl! Sure that's how she started out, but she's so much more now." he stopped and smiled. "I love her Frank." Frank was really angry now

"NO YOU DON'T DAMN IT! Just end it now before she starts to think its real! End it before-"

"FRANK!" yelled Bob suddenly. Frank turned to him and Bob nodded towards the stairs, just as Kayla disappeared back down them. "Smooth" added Bob, and ran after her. Frank glared at Gerard, Gerard glared back. Then Frank turned and went for the front door, grabbing his car keys off the counter, slipping on his sneakers and took his jacket from the rack.

"She's no good for you Gee. End it while you still can." he said as he opened the door, letting in some snow. "Now if you excuse me, I suddenly feel the urge to visit Jamia in New York. See you around." he said as he closed the door behind him. Ray, Mikey, and Gerard just sat there in the kitchen in awe.

Kayla sat in the corner of her room and cried. Frank and Gee was fighting and it was all her fault. She was to blame. How could something so right like loving Gerard turn into something as bad as a fight between two best friends? She just sat there and cried. Suddenly she heard someone coming down the stairs.

"Kayla?" said Bob from the doorway "Kayla are you alright?"

"No." she responded, wiping her eyes "This is all my fault. Frank's right. Me and Gerard can never be. Its wrong. But why does it have to be wrong Bob? Why can't they just accept who we are?" Bob clicked his tongue and walked over to where Kayla sat, on the floor leaning against her bed. He laid across the bed and got his face level with hers.

"Listen to me. This is not your fault. You and Gerard are perfect together okay?" she looked at him.

"Then why do I feel so guilty?" she asked

"Because Frank was pretty harsh. I was surprised when I heard about you and Gerard, but I think Frank took it the wrong way. You know what I think it is? I think Frank is jealous."

"What could Frank possibly be jealous of me?" she asked, laughing a little at the thought.

"I think Frank is jealous because he rarely gets to see his true love, but Gerard gets to be with you 24/7. Does that make any sense to you hun?" he asked. Kayla was surprised at just how much sense that did make. She smiled and nodded. He wiped a tear from her cheek and said

"Are you okay now?" he asked

"Yeah, yeah I am, thanks to you."

"Okay," he smiled and kissed her head. He got up from the bed and went back to the stairs.

"Oh, Bob?" she said

"Yeah Kayla?" he answered, turning around in the doorway.

"Thanks. Thanks so much." she said. Bob smiled and said

"Anytime sweetie." he said, winking. Then he turned around and went upstairs. Kayla pressed her back against the side of the bed smiling broadly. Loving Gee felt right again. Frank was someone she was gonna have to pretend with. Minimize the Gerard-Kayla-ness around him that's all. Yeah, this was going to be okay.

Frank drove through the snow, the flakes sticking to his windshield faster than his wipers could get them off. He was pissed. He swerved to avoid a car that came out into the road before he could see it. He screamed through the window at the passing car and kept driving. Suddenly his car slipped on a patch of ice he didn't see, right as he was coming on to the George Washington Bridge. The car swerved and he heard honks and squeals of brakes behind him. He turned the wheel frantically as he tried to regain control of the car, but he couldn't, the car swerved right, and smacked into the barricade between the bridge and the icy Hudson river below. Frank screamed as the car went through the steel barrier and over the edge of the bridge. He couldn't move, paralyzed with terror he just sat there and screamed as the water came closer and closer. As the hood of the car hit the water, he went silent and undid his seatbelt. Soon the entire car was underwater, heading for the bottom. He frantictically went for the door, but he could not get it open, water was filling the car quickly as it plunged deeper down into the depths of the river. It rose past his shoulders and tickled his chin, teasing him. He went crazy on the door, screaming at the top of his lungs, even though it wouldn't help. As the water went over his mouth and nose it hit him. He was going to die, alone in that car, with Gerard thinking he hated him...NO. He couldn't let that happen. He couldn't die with five people on the planet thinking I was the scum of the earth. He wouldn't let that happen. And he thought of Jamia. At the thought of never seeing her face again he turned on his back and kicked madly at the door, but he was running out of oxygen. Suddenly, the window shattered. He swam through it and straight up, he could barely tell which way was up he was so numb from the freezing water. He just thought to himself _don't stop don't stop swimming. Get to the surface and you'll be fine. Jamia. Jamia. Jamia. Think about Jamia. _Yes, he thought of Jamia and he didn't stop picturing her face until his face broke the surface of the water. He could feel a strong wind and looked up to see a helicopter. Dropping down from said helicopter was a cable with a net and a man. The man reached out a hand to Frank which he took, grabbing on and not letting go for anything. The man pulled him into the net and handed him a blanket.

"You're a very lucky guy" said the man. "How the hell did you manage to get out of there?" he asked looking at Frank like he was immortal.

"I have unfinished business with some friends of mine I guess." said Frank, wrapping himself in the blanket, grateful for the warmth.

Kayla was sitting on the couch with Gerard watching T.V. Suddenly the channel turned to an emergency drill test. The screen went white and scrolled "THIS IS A TEST OF THE EMERGENCY BROADCASTING SYSYTEM. THIS TEST WILL RUN FOR THE NEXT TWENTY MINUTES ON EVERY CHANNEL". Gee and Kayla both looked at the screen, eyebrows raised.

"That's a new one." said Gerard after a minute or so. "Twenty minutes of straight white screen on every channel. You know what that means right?" Kayla shifted in her spot on the couch, she knew what it meant...but wanted him to say it.

"No..." she said, playfully. He moved closer to her and said

"It means...that we now have a lot of free time on our hands." he came closer still until he was just barely on her he kissed her lightly. She smiled and said

"Hmmmmm. I like free time." she pulled him by the collar down over her and kissed him again. They just stayed like that kissing for a few minutes. Then the phone rang. Gerard lifted his head, his eyes still closed and let out an annoyed breath.

"I'll be...RIGHT BACK." he said and walked into the kitchen to answer the phone. Kayla listened to Gerard's side of the conversation.

"Hello?" then a pause

"Yes this is Gerard Way." another pause

"WHAT? WHAT HAPPENED TO HIM? THE-THE GW BRIDGE?! OH MY GOD. OH MY GOD WHAT HOSPITAL IS HE AT?" Kayla sat bolt upright. A hospital? Who was in a hospital? Then it hit her. Frank. Something happened to Frank. She heard Gerard hang up the phone and he ran to get Ray and Mikey.

"RAY! MIKEY! BOB! GET IN THE CAR! NOW!" Gerard yelled to the general air around him. Mikey and Ray came running into the kitchen.

"Gee what's going on?" ask Mikey panicking.

"I'll explain on the way. Just get in the car. You too Kayla. C'mon guys. Lets go I'll explain everything on the way to the hospital."

"HOSTPITAL?" screamed Ray and Bob as they followed Gerard out. Kayla scrambled off the couch and followed the three outside. Gerard got behind the wheel, Mikey, Kayla and Bob got in the back, Ray in the front passenger seat. They sped off well above the speed limit towards Valley Hospital.

"Okay Gerard spill. Whose in the hospital?" said Ray after a few minutes of frantic turns.

"Okay," said Gerard taking a huge breath. "It's Frankie. He...he was on his way into New York to see Jamia and he lost control of the car on the George Washington Bridge. Somehow...somehow his car went over the barricade and...into the Hudson river." he stopped and took several deep breaths in the dead silence of the car.

"He, he actually got himself out of the car while it was underwater and they brought him to Valley Hospital via helicopter. They say he's fine but they need to make sure of that. Routine stuff you know?" Kayla let out a huge sigh of relief as soon as he said Frank was fine. Then she started to shake and cry. The feeling of this being her fault hit her again full force. She felt Mikey's and Bob's arms close around her. They drove on to the hospital that way in total silence.

When they got there they ran like hell to the desk and asked for Frank Iero's room. They ran down a hallway, made a right, down two more hallways, and right into Frank's room. He was sitting there, propped up by what looked like ten pillows. He smiled when they walked in. He sat up and said

"Gee. Gee I'm so sorry Gee. And Kayla. I didn't mean those things I said. I really didn't. I just had a bad reaction and I'm so sorry. I felt like scum of the earth and that's why I had to get out of that car. So I could apologize. I couldn't die with you guys hating me I just couldn't. Kayla sobbed and ran over to Frank. She hugged him tight and whispered

"You're so forgiven." he put an arm around her and patted her back.

"Thank you." he said. Kayla stood up and wiped a tear from her eye. Gerard walked over to his other side and said

"Damn you Iero. How the hell could I hate you?" he smiled at his friend then bent down and gave him a huge brother bear hug.

"What a great time to tell me." laughed Frank. Now go to the desk and tell them I'm fine! I wanna go home!" everyone laughed and Frank was lost in the best group hug ever hugged.


	10. Chapter 9

**CHAPTER 9**

When Frank was checked out of the hospital, finally told by the doctors that he was totally fine, the six friends were struck with new energy. They could be seen out walking arm over shoulder over shoulder walking down a street, getting stopped for autographs every so often, and taking pictures with fans that walked by. Being all together, enjoying life in general, plopping down randomly in the snow of a front yard to make a snow angel. Frank had come to realize that Gee and Kayla being together wasn't really as bad as he originally felt it was. They were in love, like him and Jamia and it wasn't fair to take that away from Gee. Besides, they were so cute together. It seemed like Gee never let go of Kayla. She was almost always pressed tight against Gee's side by his arm around her waist. It became a strange occurrence to see them not like that. Sometimes the guys wondered if there had ever been a tighter couple than Gerard Way and Kayla Rogers. The particular day that this chapter falls on was New Years Eve. The guys had decided that a night full of horror movies would make sure everyone had fun. Mikey appointed himself chief of movie picking and once they were outside the Blockbuster store he addressed his five friends in a peppy football coach voice.

"Okay gang I want you to go in there, and each of you pick out the two goriest, most special effectiest, rated R shit you can find!" everyone pumped their fists in the air and said

"AY SIR!" and ran into the blockbuster. They ran in six different directions on the quest for the scare the shit out of you movies. When they reconvened at the front counter, the collection was as such:

-The excorsist  
-Night of the living dead  
-Saw  
-Sixth Sense  
-Scream  
-Psycho  
-IT  
-The shining

"This is gonna be great." said Gerard loading the videos onto the counter and pulling out his wallet. "Next stop: FOOD!" they bagged the videos and ran the two blocks to the local supermarket. Ray orchestrated this one. His address to the team was much shorter than Mikey's.

"Okay...go in there and buy sugar, carbs, and carbonation!" he said. The five responded with a "FUCK YEAH!" and ran into the store. When they all met at the cashier they had what looked like seven different flavors of chips, four kinds of popcorn, pretzels, a least five six packs of soda and beer, candy of at least ten varieties, and loads of other stuff that they probably weren't even paying attention when they pulled it off the shelf. They each were loaded down with at least three bags a piece now, and raced home to prepare for the movie marathon.

At around six o clock, they all sat in the living room in pajamas with food and movies. A vote was taken and Saw was the first movie they watched. Mikey was by far the loudest screamer. Kayla and Frank however, laughed at some parts of the movie, earning strange looks from Bob, Ray, and Gee. By the time they'd shown Sixth sense, Psycho, IT, and Night of the Living Dead, Gee and Kayla were done with movies. They sat on the couch totally making out and Mikey jokingly pointed and said

"FRAANK! Make it STOOOP!" Frank turned around and chucked a handful of candy corn at the glued together pair and said

"Hey! Save it for the countdown!" he laughed, shook his head and went back to the movie. Gee tried to go back to Kayla, but she pushed him off, laughed and said

"Cut it out! I'm trying to watch the movie!" Gee laughed and contented himself just stroking her hair and holding her tight when she got scared. A few hours later Ray had to kick Bob to wake him up. It was 11:58 and so Mikey turned off the movie and switched to NBC4, where the camera was on the ball in Times Square. The VCR clock turned to 11:59 and everyone stood up. Mikey said

"I'll be right back." and ran into the kitchen. He emerged seconds later with not a cup, but the whole carton of eggnog. Everyone laughed and he said "What?" Then the crowd in Times Square began to shout as the ball began to drop.

"10, 9, 8, 7..." the friends in their den joined in. and jumped a little on each number. Gee pulled Kayla close as they counted down.

"7, 6, 5, 4, 3, 2..." right as the clock hit midnight, Gee quickly turned his head and kissed Kayla. He timed it perfectly. Her eyes barely hat time to register 12:00 before he kissed her_. Incredible. He's perfect at everything isn't he?_ They kissed for the full minute of midnight and released her when the clock turned to 12:01.

"Happy new year." he whispered in her ear.

"Best one yet." she whispered back. They all exchanged "Happy new year"s and hugs then everyone departed to their beds, leaving the mess to clean up in the morning. A few hours later, close to 3 am, Kayla couldn't sleep. She lay in her bed, hands tucked under her head and just smiled, thinking about Gee. Thinking about who they were as individuals, and as one person, and as unaccepted in society, because of their age. She didn't care that he was older, he didn't care that she was younger, so what was the problem? He wasn't hurting her. He respected her in every way. So why, she wondered, would they be in so much trouble if the relationship went public? She wanted everyone to know, she wanted to scream it from the top of a building, and write it on every surface she could find, but she couldn't and that made her so sad. But at least she had Gee. She had to keep that in mind. Unable to lay there staring at her canopy any longer, she tiptoed into Gee's room. The glow of a streetlight illuminated the room enough for her to see her way to where he slept. she crouched down next to his bed, her face level with his and just looked at him. His hair was mostly grown back to its original length, it was like the "ghost of you" video never happened. She reached out her hand and pushed his hair gently off his face to see him clearly. She was still in awe at how one person could be so beautiful in so many ways. As her fingers brushed his cheek his lips curled into a small smile. She wondered what he was dreaming about that made him so happy. Her heart leaped at the thought that he might be dreaming of her. She just sat there for a few minutes, looking at him, watching him breathe, watching him smile. Then she was struck with how stalker-ish and obsessive this looked, so she went back to her room and fell asleep almost immediately, and dreamed about Gee.


	11. Chapter 10

**CHAPTER 10**

The months between January and April went pretty much like December did, except for the whole Frank going over the bridge and into the Hudson River thing, so for the purpose of saving time, this chapter begins on the morning of April seventh. The touring had begun again and everyone was having fun. Kayla loved watching her boyfriend worked the crowds every night. He looked so mighty on stage with Frank, Bob, Ray, and Mikey up there with him. She never went out on stage because they knew how much trouble they'd be in if people found out his girlfriend wasn't even sixteen yet. The morning of April seventh, two days before Gee's birthday and four before Kayla's, preparations for a small joint party were in order. Summer and Jamia were coming out to see Gee, along with some of his other friends. Mikey came over to Kayla as she sat sipping her coffee and said

"So Kayla, want any of your home friends to come out here for your birthday?" Kayla's stomach dropped a little at the phrase "home friends".

"You guys are my home friends." she said, without even looking at him.

"Well, want to bring some _school _friends out then?" Kayla's stomach dropped further at the thought of school and old home.

"No." she said sharply. "I don't want to hear from or see anyone from Glen Rock ever. I thought I'd made that clear but I guess not." she looked at Mikey this time and he rolled his eyes and sighed. He sat down next to her.

"Kayla you can't outrun your family forever." he said wrapping his arm around her.

"I'm not." she said, as honestly as she could "You guys ARE my family. I'm not outrunning anything."

"Yes you are Kayla. You won't call your parents, you wouldn't leave your bunk when we went through your town when we left the house to start touring again, and you clam up whenever we mention your home. It doesn't work like that Kayla. You have to face up to this sometime. I think it might be a good idea if you brought your mom out here for your birthday." Kayla's mouth dropped open and she stood up quickly. How could Mikey honestly be suggesting that?

"Are you crazy?" she yelled, louder and harsher than she had intended. She stopped, closed her eyes and took in a deep breath before she allowed herself to speak again. "I can't do that Mikey. Don't you understand? I just can't handle that okay?"

"Yes you can." he said, standing up in front of her and taking her shoulders tightly. Kayla shook her head and looked anywhere but at Mikey. But something about the way she trusted him made her buckle and give in. After a minute or two of heavy breathing she said

"Okay...but you're calling her. Not me." Mikey smiled and said

"No problem. This will be good for you. I promise." he walked away and grabbed her cell phone from the bunk area of the bus. Kayla sat down with her arms crossed. She bit her lip to keep herself from crying as she heard him on the phone with her mother.

They hadn't done anything for Gee's birthday except for a small cake between the six of them. Gee didn't want a big party, he said he felt old knowing he was twenty nine now. For some reason knowing that her boyfriend was twenty-nine didn't disturb her at all. The day her mother was coming over Kayla was getting ready in the bathroom area of the bus. She was just doing her makeup so the door was open. Gerard walked into the small doorway and slid his arms around her.

"Wow." he said. "You look so...preppy." Kayla scowled at her reflection in the mirror. She was wearing a pale pink button-down short sleeve blouse with a khaki knee-length skirt and black heels. Her makeup was just eyeliner on the top lids and a bit of pale pink gloss. Her hair was neatly tied back with a ribbon that matched her blouse. Then she looked at Gerard, his arms around her. He contrasted so sharply to her. There she was, wearing a prep bitch dress up outfit, and there he was, her boyfriend, the man she loved, who still had the guts to wear the same bulletproof vest he wore onstage. She looked at his head resting on her shoulder, his eyes, his dark makeuped eyes,

"Baby you're wearing more makeup than I am." she said breaking out in laughter. He did too and let go of her waist.

"Excuse me, I have to get some of this makeup off me. I'm now afraid for my manliness. I now have to say I wore more make up than my girlfriend." he said, walking away. She laughed and shook her head, smiling. Just then she heard Ray's voice from the front of the bus. Kayla's stomach dropped; her mother was here. She walked out into the front of the bus to see her mother beaming at her, arms outstretched. She ran to Kayla and enveloped her in a huge hug. Kayla closed her eyes. She wanted to vomit as she put her arms around her mother, clenching her teeth tightly. Finally, after what seemed like an eternity her mother released her.

"You look nice." said her mother, touching Kayla's hair.

"Thanks" said Kayla, grimacing and refusing to look her in the eye. Kayla figured she should introduce the guys. "Mom, this is Frank, Ray, Mikey, Bob, and Gee...Gerard." she said, pointing to each of them. Her mother lifted a hand in a small wave, the botox smile refusing to leave her face. They each waved back, their smiles much more genuine. They sat around the table and ate in basic silence, punctured occasionally by a "pass the chicken" or "more salad please". Once lunch was over Kayla's mother addressed her.

"Kayla, sweetie, I brought you a birthday present." Kayla was genuinely interested in what her mother had brought her. She handed Kayla a box wrapped in pretty birthday paper. Kayla tore off the paper and saw a "make your own neon sign" kit.

"I know how much you love to make your own room decorations so I thought you might like it."

"Wow mom." said Kayla. She really liked this kit. Her mom was right, she did like making things like these.

"I thought it might look nice over your bed." said her mother hopefully.

"Oh...well, I don't think I have an outlet over my bunk." Kayla pointed to the back of the bus.

"No, Kayla." said her mother "I mean your room at home." Kayla pondered it, then said

"No, I don't think it will go well with the current décor in my room at Gerard and Mikey's house. Sorry, I'll find a place for it though-"

"NO. Kayla. Silly, I mean home with me. Me and your father. We worked things out Kayla. Everything's fine. He moved back in and you can come home now. That's why I'm here isn't it? To bring you home?" Kayla dropped the kit. She definitely heard something inside shatter but she didn't care.

"H-H-Home? Y-Y-You and dad? No. No mom." Kayla looked down, thinking hard. Her mother couldn't possibly think Kayla was going home with her could she? No way. Not gonna happen. Kayla didn't know what to say other than

"N-no. N-no. Someone please show her out. Please." Kayla stood up, her head still down and went to the back of the bus to her bunk. She heard the bus door slam and a car's ignition start up and she let out a long shuddering breath. She ran into the bathroom and got her razor. It still had some shaving cream in the blade from when she had shaved her legs that morning but she didn't care. She climbed up into her bunk and held it to her wrist. She toyed with it a little, sliding it back and forth across the vein, thinking about weather or not it was worth it to just push a little harder and slide it again. She couldn't get her mother's sickly hopeful voice out of her head. She kept envisioning what her mother's face must have looked like as she walked out of the bus. She let out a hyperventilated sob a little louder than she meant to, and heard Ray call out to her.

"Kayla? Kayla are you alright?" _Shit. _She thought to herself. _Just do it now Kayla. Just press a little harder and slide it across. Do it before Ray comes back here! Just do it already!_ She forced herself to press down she felt a little cut form, she prepared her right hand to just slide to the left and slice...

"KAYLA!" her head snapped up and the pink razor clattered to the floor. "Kayla what do you think you're doing?" Ray looked up at her from the floor in total awe. She lost it. Her face contorted in a silent scream as she cried. Ray scurried up the ladder and sat next to her on the bed.

"Kayla, come on your mom can't be worth doing that. Come on what would that have done to Gerard." _Shit I didn't think of that. _The thought of how much she would have hurt Gee made her cry even harder. Ray slid closer to Kayla and wrapped his arms around her, completely covering her in warm caring Ray-ness. She collapsed into his hug and cried into his shoulder. She sat there and cried and Ray didn't seem to mind. He just sat there and rubbed her arms, trying to comfort her as best as he could.


	12. Chapter 11

**CHAPTER 11**

Kayla mostly kept to herself over the next month or so. As far as she knew Ray had not told anyone about what he saw her almost do, but she couldn't be sure. Every now and then Mikey, or Frank, or Bob would look at her funny and she'd wonder if they knew. The one person who seemed to be totally oblivious was Gee. He seemed to think she was just in a bit of a bad mood, causing him to spend more and more time with her, trying to cheer her up. Kayla didn't mind at all. She loved how he was constantly with her now. If he wasn't holding her hand he had his arm around her waist. If his arm wasn't around her waist he was hugging her from behind, resting his chin on her shoulder. One day he was sitting on his bunk flicking through a Rolling Stone magazine and she walked past.

"Helloooo down there!" he called to her, smiling.

"Hey Gee." she said back up to him, forcing a smile. He seemed to be in a very happy mood, she didn't want to kill it.

"Come up and sit with Me." he said, patting the spot next to him. He sat all the way up, back propped against the wall. Kayla sat in front of him and rested her head against his chest. He wrapped his arms around her and let his hands meet and fold on her stomach. Kayla pushed against his chest just to feel him behind her. She traced the outline of his fingers with hers. And they just sat like that for a little while until Kayla broke the silence.

"Gee."

"Hmm?" he mumbled. Lifting his head. He must have dozed off.

"What do you think happens to us when we die? Where do we go?" Gerard stayed silent, pondering the question.

"I...I think once we die...that's it. Once we die...it just ends there. But that's for the unlucky ones. The ones with stuff they need to do become ghosts until they finish their life's work...and the lucky ones...never die. Immortality is something that happens. But its something you need to...earn. If you do enough good stuff with your time on earth, I believe you are allowed to live on forever." Kayla sat and let that sink in.

What...what do you think is going to happen to us? Are we just going to end?" Kayla asked.

"I don't think there's anything better we could have done with our lives than to have found each other." he whispered in her ear. He hugged Kayla tighter and she pressed her head into his chest. She turned to the side and listened to his heartbeat. He bent his head down and kissed her where her neck met her shoulder.

"Gee." she said, her eyes closed, listening to him breathe.

"Yeah Kayla?" he said. His chest vibrated when he spoke, tickling Kayla's ear.

"You know I love you right?"

"Yeah Kayla I know."

"Do you love me?"

"Of course I do."

That was the last thing Kayla heard before she drifted off into sleep, sung a lullaby by Gerard's heartbeat.


	13. Chapter 12

**CHAPTER 12**

Months passed of touring and soon Kayla's seventeenth birthday came around. Mikey kept his mouth shut when it came to Kayla's parents, and her birthday just sort of came and went as Gee's did. Kayla didn't really mind. Gee wished her a happy birthday, so at least he didn't forget or anything. They just had other things to do. One day, in August, four months after Kayla's seventieth and Gerard's thirtieth, he asked the bus driver to stop in the middle of a small town. Gerard had been looking out the window at the passing stores and just suddenly yelled

"Stop the bus!" he jumped up and told the bus driver to wait. He ran right into a store that Kayla couldn't see the sign for and wondered what on earth he could be doing. About ten minutes later he came back on the bus, a slight bulge in his pocket.

"What was that all about Gee?" asked Bob, one eyebrow raised.

"Nothing. Nothing at all." said Gee, sitting down and pushing the bulge farther down into his jeans.

Over the next few weeks that bulge rarely left Gerard's pocket. Sometimes Kayla would catch Gerard looking at her, lost in thought, his hand in his pocket. Kayla wondered what it could possibly be. One day they were all really bored, so they sat around the table and played truth or dare. So far the dares/truths were as such:

-Mikey made out with Frank

-Ray body-slammed Gerard

-Kayla punched Bob

-Gerard sucked Frank's toes

-Bob attempted to play guitar

Then finally Mikey got to ask Kayla.

"Okay Kayla truth or dare?" he asked.

"...Truth." said Kayla, afraid of a dare as gross as Gerard's last one. Everybody went "Awww! Pansy! " and Mikey stopped them.

"Fine." he stopped and thought of a good question. Then he smiled and asked "How 'EXPERIENCED' are you and you know what I mean." he said. Kayla rolled her eyes and said

"Do I honestly have to answer that?" she looked at Mikey with an exasperated smile.

"YES!" he answered. "Because otherwise you have to take the dare!" Kayla clicked her tongue

"FINE. If you honestly have to know...I'm a virgin...perv." she added. Everyone sort of stayed quiet then Frank said smiling

"GEEEEEEEEE! Kayla's a virgin! Fix it!" Kayla leaned over and punched Frank in the arm. Gerard went very red, which surprised Kayla. She wasn't embarrassed at all really. She wished Frank hadn't said it, but she didn't really care. Then Gerard blurted out

"I wanna ask Kayla a dare." he spoke very spastically, like the words didn't want to come out. "Dare from me Kayla?' he said, a little more steadily. Kayla was concerned and said

"Yeah Gee okay. What dare?" he came over to where she was sitting and finally pulled the bulge out of his pocket. It was so small she couldn't see it from being balled up in his fist. He knelt down in front of Kayla and her jaw dropped. _He's not...No way...he can't be!_ She thought to herself. But the more she tried to convince herself he wasn't, the more it seemed that he was. Mikey, Bob, Ray, and Frank were beginning to realize what was going on as well and seemed twice as shocked as Kayla was. Then Gerard spoke.

"Kayla, it's been almost two years since we first came and got you, and ever since we did, I've been riding on a cloud. That's all thanks to you. Ever since the day you told me you loved me, I knew you were perfect. They way you talk, the way you smile, the way you walk, the way you think. I love you for all of it, everything you do. I never want to run the risk of losing you. It seems like no matter what I ever do, its always enough to make you happy, so I'm going to do more than enough right now. Kayla, truth or dare?" Kayla still wasn't sure she understood what was going on, but she said

"Dare..." and he opened the box in his hand. Inside was a ring with a silver band, a diamond was set perfectly, wrapped in small tendrils of silver that held it to the band. The silver tendrils would around the top of the ring and wound together in tight knots across the band.

"Kayla Jean Rogers...I dare you to marry me." he said, his Adam's apple bobbing like crazy. _Is he fighting back tears? Oh my god he is!_ she thought to herself. Then she realized she had to answer him. She smiled and fought back tears of her own, but they spilled foreword anyway as she said

"Yes. Yes Gerard Way I will marry you." she closed her eyes as he pulled the ring out of the box and slipped it onto her finger. It fit her perfectly. She held it up to the light and watched the diamond glitter for a moment. Then she looked down at Gerard, still kneeling there like he was stuck. She knelt down next to him and kissed him hard. They just knelt on the floor like that, and then someone started to clap. Kayla wasn't sure, but she thought it was Bob. Then the other three joined in and they were lost in a sea of hugs and congratulations. But Kayla wouldn't let go. She was realizing that now she never had to let go. She was always going to be with Gerard, no matter what happened, she would always be with him.


	14. Chapter 13

**CHAPTER 13**

Thirteen months from when Gee and Kayla were engaged, Kayla was in the bride's room in the church. They wanted a fall wedding, but they had to wait a year so Kayla would be old enough to marry without her parent's consent. They were actually having the wedding in the same church where "Helena" was filmed. It was a beautiful church and Kayla couldn't get enough of it. She was being helped with her dress by Jamia, who she had become great friends with. Kayla's dress was a pearl white, shiny satin from the waist down, and a perfect lacy corset-like top. Her sleeves were like perfect white spider webs tight against her arms, the sleeves had holes in the end that her thumbs poked through. Her veil was long, it came down to about her knees, shading her chestnut brown hair. Suddenly there was a knock on the door.

"Kayla! Jamia! It's me Gerard! Let me in!"

"NO!" screamed Kayla and Jamia in unison. Then Jamia added, "You can't see the bride before the wedding its bad luck!"

"Okay so what I just scream through the door?" he yelled.

"Yeah basically." said Kayla. "Gee, sweetie what is it?"

"Kayla your parents are here. Don't ask me how they found out about this I have no idea but they're here and they're demanding to watch the service." Kayla's jaw dropped. _My parents? Here? How did they find out I was getting married?_ She thought to herself.

"Kayla its up to you weather they get to come in or not. Just let me know what to tell them." said Gerard. "Do we let them in or not?"

"Hmm, let me take three seconds to think about this." said Kayla sarcastically. "NO OF COURSE DON'T LET THEM IN GEE ARE YOU CRAZY?"

"Okay. I love you baby, see you at the altar." he said. Kayla heard his footsteps retreating down the stairs.

"Okay THAT was weird." said Jamia, straightening Kayla's veil. "You look PERFECT Kayla. Absolutely incredible."

"You really think so?" said Kayla looking disapprovingly at herself in the mirror.

"Gerard's going to go CRAZY." she said, smiling. Kayla stopped and smiled.

"Gerard..." she said, more to herself then to Jamia. "He's going to be my husband...I'm getting married." she turned to Jamia and smiled. "I'm getting married!" She hugged Jamia and felt her whole life falling into place.

Downstairs, Kayla stood outside the door leading into the church. She watched as the bridesmaids walked in. The bridesmaids were some of her old friends from Glen Rock; Jamie, Marisa, Shannon, Beckie, Liz and then there was Jamia. As she heard her cue to enter, a tear leaked down her cheek. _I am marrying Gerard. I cannot believe I am actually marrying Gerard._ She thought to herself. She shook her head to pull herself together and walked into the church. She looked at the altar where the minister stood, to his right were the bridesmaids, waiting for her to take her place, and to his left were Mikey, Bob, Frank, and Ray. Gerard had actually appointed them all as best men. Then she saw the only thing in the whole church she was interested in: Gerard. She had never seen him in a tuxedo before. He looked so handsome. Of course he wasn't wearing makeup. But, she didn't mind. He still looked incredible. She made it to the altar and took her place next to Gerard, in front of the minister. She handed her bouquet off to Shannon, the nearest bridesmaid and let her hands fall. Gerard took her hand in his, lacing their fingers as the minister began to speak.

"Love. Love is what makes the world go round. It can bind souls together, or rip them apart. Today, we are gathered in this church to cement the soul-binding love between Kayla and Gerard." the minister looked to Frank and Mikey. "The rings please." Mikey and Frank each pulled out a box with a ring. The way they had organized it was Frank and Mikey were the ring bearers, and Bob and Ray were responsible for getting Gee the hell out of there should he feel like backing out. Mikey handed Kayla Gerard's ring and the minister spoke to Kayla.

"Kayla Jean Rogers. Do you take this man Gerard Arthur Way to be your lawfully wedded husband, to have and to hold, to love and to cherish, for richer or for poorer, in sickness and in health, as long as you both shall live?" Kayla looked Gerard in the eyes and said

"I do". She slipped the band onto Gerard's finger.

The minister turned to Gerard as Frank handed him Kayla's ring.

"And do you, Gerard Arthur Way take this woman Kayla Jean Rogers to be your lawfully wedded wife, to have and to hold, to love and to cherish, for richer or for poorer in sickness and in health, for as long as you both shall live?"

"Like hell I do!" he said, grinning ear to ear. Kayla couldn't help it, she let out a tiny laugh, but fell silent as Gerard slipped the wedding band onto Kayla's finger above the engagement ring. She couldn't stop herself. Tears flooded down her face as she looked at Gerard and the ring on his finger. Then the minister spoke.

"Then by the power vested in me by the almighty Jesus Christ, I now pronounce you husband and wife. You may kiss the bride." Kayla loved how she had to stand on her toes to kiss him. She wrapped her arms around his neck and kissed him, long and deep. He kissed back furiously. No one could tell them it was wrong anymore. She was eighteen; she could get married without her parents telling her it was okay. She could marry whomever she wanted to, and she wanted to marry Gerard. _I just did marry Gerard._ She thought. _No one is ever going to make me let go. Not anymore. This is forever. This is what immortality feels like..._When Kayla and Gerard stopped the minister addressed them.

"So, Mr. Way, Mrs. Way, what now?" Gerard tilted his head and poked his tongue into the inside of his face. He spoke to the whole church, but didn't take his eyes off Kayla.

"We are heading to Puerto Rick for two weeks. We're going to take in the sights, get some sun, play in the ocean...maybe in some other places too..." he stopped for a minute, just staring into Kayla's eyes. Then very abruptly, he scooped her up into his arms. She squealed as her feet left the ground. Shannon rushed and handed her the bouquet, which Kayla threw as Gerard carried her out at a speed that increased with every step. She wasn't sure, but she thought Shannon had caught the bouquet. He opened the door to the limo without even putting her down. He lowered her gently into the limo and climbed in after her. The limo drove away as everyone ran out of the church to wave. Kayla and Gerard set off for Puerto Rico.

When they got to their hotel room Kayla was in awe. When Bob said he had gotten them a nice room...he wasn't kidding! The room was mostly white, the walls, ceiling and carpet were white. The white curtains billowed in the wind that came from a screen door that was open just a crack that opened into a balcony overlooking a beach. Gerard strolled over to the bed and plopped down on the edge, taking in the whole room. There was a full entertainment system in one corner; T.V, DVD, VCR, CD player. The wall curved into a kitchenette with a stove, a microwave, a fridge, a toaster and a line of cabinets. Gerard just sat there and Kayla went to inspect the bathroom. There was grey tile floor and walls, his and hers towels and sinks, a shower, and an oversized tub. The first thought that came to Kayla's mind was _if there's a shower then why would they need a tub?_ But she thought about it for a minute then realized she was way to innocent for her own good. She walked back into the bedroom where Gee had gone from sitting on the bed to laying down on it. She walked over and lay down on top of him. He kissed her. Then they lay like that and Kayla loved how they breathed on the same beat. She placed her head on his chest and listened to his heartbeat. She loved to do that. She just loved to hear him existing beside her. Then she spoke, mocking the minister

"So, Mr. Way. What now?" he kissed her again.

"Well, considering it's our wedding night I was SORT OF hoping you would finally put out." he said laughing a little. "You've been so mean making me wait like this." he kissed her a third time. Kayla thought about it for a second, and then decided not to stop him as his hands went toward her belt...

When Kayla woke up the next morning, Gerard was already awake. He was just staring at her and smiling like a lunatic. She laughed at the thought of what she had just finished sleeping off. Needless to say Kayla and Gerard had had a pretty busy night. Gee reached over to her and pushed her hair off her face. She grabbed his arm and traced his veins with her fingers. Weird, yes, but Gerard seemed to find it cute. Her finger traced up his hand and into his fingertips, which he lightly rested against hers. They stayed that way, touching fingertips and laughing together. Each night and each morning went just like that for all two weeks of their honeymoon.


	15. Chapter 14

**CHAPTER 14**

Mikey was sitting by the window that looked out into the street of his and Gerard's house. He was getting worried. Gee and Kayla's flight was due back four hours ago. Their cab should have pulled up by now and dropped them off. Mikey missed his brother and was determined to be there when he walked through the door to give him a proper welcome home. Bob, Ray, and Frank however had given up a while ago and were in the kitchen playing cards. Losers. Was he the only one who cared? Was he the only one who actually missed Kayla and Gerard? Sure, he wasn't the biggest fan of Kayla, but she was his sister in law now and he loved her. Suddenly a little yellow taxi pulled up in front of the house. Mikey smiled and yelled toward the kitchen

"THEY'RE BACK! KAYLA AND GEE ARE BACK!" Three chairs scraped against the floor as Frank, Bob, and Ray jumped up. Mikey heard cards fall to the floor as he wrenched open the front door. He ran like a dog after a bone to Gee and tackled him with a huge hug that brought both of them to the ground. You could hear laughter mixed in with the "I missed you bro"s and "how was it without me?"s. Ray, Bob, and Frank all took turns hugging Kayla, figuring they'd wait on Gerard until Mikey was done. Finally Kayla broke the happy group

"Okay get off me everybody I need to lay down. Not feeling to well all of a sudden." she grabbed her personals bag and went inside. She went straight downstairs and was suddenly faced with a problem...she and Gerard were married now...did they still sleep in their separate rooms? Or did they pick one and sleep together? She dismissed the thought and figured she'd just go to her old room until she could figure it out with Gee. She was ready to go into her room when she suddenly felt like she was going to vomit. She ran back upstairs and into the bathroom and threw up a few times. Then she heard Gerard's voice outside the bathroom door

"Kayla, sweetie are you okay?" Kayla heaved again before saying

"Yeah baby I'm fine." _Baby. Baby. _That word started echoing very loudly, bouncing around off the walls in Kayla's head, and as she sat there leaning on the toilet bowl, her late period started to feel more and more important.

**Two Weeks Later**

Kayla had always found the deep shade of blue she was looking at very ugly, but now it was suddenly one of the most beautiful colors in the world. She chucked the plastic stick into the trash can and ran to the top of the stairs. She called to her husband

"GEE! GEE SWEETIE COME HERE!" Gerard came bounding out of his room and ran up to meet her.

"What's up Kayla?" he asked. She didn't answer right away. She just grabbed him and kissed him hard. When she stopped she ran her fingers through his hair and then rested her hands on his cheeks and said

"I love you. So, so much. I love you" she kissed him again. She didn't really want to stop kissing him, but he pulled back.

"Kayla, sweetheart I love you too now tell me what's going on! What are you so excited about?" she smiled even wider and took his hands

"Now Gee I know we haven't really had time to talk about this yet...but Gee, honey, sweetie...We're going to have a baby!" Gerard's jaw dropped and his smile was wiped right from his face. He seemed to be slowly processing what Kayla had just said and he did not seem happy. _Is he angry? Oh my God is he upset that I'm pregnant?_ She thought to herself. As if to answer her mental question, the smile returned to Gerard's face and he knelt down, eye level with her stomach. His eyes kept darting between Kayla's stomach and her face. She smiled too as he pointed tentatively towards her stomach and said

"There...there's a little...a little someone in there? A...a baby? Our baby?" Kayla laughed and nodded. He placed his hand gently on her stomach and Kayla placed her hand on his. He spoke to her stomach, to the baby.

"Hey...hey little guy-or girl. Whatever you are. I...I guess I'm your daddy. Oh God I really hope I don't screw you up..." Kayla gave Gerard a pathetic look and pulled him up to meet her.

"Gee baby you're not going to screw the baby up. Oh God you are not going to screw the baby up. We're going to have a baby and we're going to be happier than we ever were before." Gerard kissed her and whispered

"I don't think I could ever be happier than I am right now Kayla. If I ever was I swear I'd explode."

"I love you." she said. She couldn't say that enough now. She couldn't stop telling him that she loved him. "I love you I love you I love you."

"I love you, and I love our baby." he said, pressing her forehead to his lips. I will always love you and our baby."

"You are going to make the perfect father." said Kayla, tears streaming down her cheeks.

"Not as perfect as you are going to be as a mother." he said. "Want to go tell the guys?" he asked.

"Yeah let's do that." she said, he held her hand and they walked into the den where Ray, Frank, Bob, and Mikey sat playing video games. They stopped as Gerard cleared his throat.

"Sup?" said Frank, looking from the happily crying Kayla to the hysterically smiling Gerard.

"We're going to have a baby." said Gerard, hugging Kayla with one arm, the other on his own hip. "Kayla's pregnant."

"Whoa," said Ray, eyebrows disappearing into his hair. "You two didn't waste any time did you?" he laughed. Kayla laughed too, and Gerard pulled her tightly into another kiss.

_The perfect husband, father, and person. That's what I married._ Thought Kayla to herself. _We're going to be so happy._


	16. Chapter 15

**CHAPTER 15**

The first month of Kayla's pregnancy was a haze of mornings over the toilet and lots of cramping. Her stomach always hurt, and so did her head. When she wasn't throwing up she was sending the guys on food runs whenever she would get a craving. These cravings could be a simple as a bag of chips or Chinese takeout, or as hard to get as fresh seedless watermelon, seeing as it was October. She would cry for an hour or more and then all of a sudden be all smiles, and just as suddenly she could chuck something against a wall just to hear it smash. Gerard seemed to be the only one who didn't mind his wife's behavior. He was not about to get mad at the woman who was carrying his baby. He could never be angry with her; she was his Kayla, his beautiful wife. And besides, its not like she was constantly on a mood swing rampage, sometimes she was totally normal, and he just had to wait it out for one of those times whenever she got out of hand. As the break before the new leg of touring drew to a close, the problem came up as to weather Kayla was coming with them or not. They sat in the kitchen and argued about it, right in front of Kayla.

"Of course she's coming! She's my wife! She has my baby! I can't leave her here all by herself!" said Gerard. Mikey stood next to him, nodding with everything he said. Mikey thought he had to stick with his legal and blood family on this one. I mean come on, blood is thicker than water, and legal documents are stronger than blood and water combined, so he figured siding with Kayla and Gerard was the best choice.

"Gerard she's out of her mind half the time! It's like dealing with the incredible hulk!" yelled Frank.

"I resent that." said Kayla. "I am not that fat yet! I'm only one month pregnant." Kayla had begun taking things very literally lately, even Gerard could see that. It rather put an end to joking around with her nearby.

"I don't know how much more of your wife I can take Gee." added Bob, shaking his head.

"I can't believe you guys are saying that! Come on this is Kayla we're talking about." he pointed to her standing in the corner of the kitchen. "You know, the girl you've known since she was fifteen, the girl who made everyone laugh, MY FUCKING WIFE!" he added the last part a little louder. "I don't know anymore, Ray what do you think?"

"Honestly," said Ray "I couldn't care less weather she comes or not. I wouldn't mind if she did, but I probably wouldn't lose any sleep if she didn't. So let us just say for the sake of argument that I want her to come. There, now it's two on two and it's up to Kayla to decide." he said, folding his arms and looking at Kayla.

"DAMN YOU TORO!" said Frank, smacking the table. He knew now that Kayla was coming with them. Kayla spoke

"Of course I want to come. I want to be with my husband and my brother and my friends." this was one of her normal days, so she was being pretty reasonable. No shouting, no crying, no smashing glass objects...

So it was settled that Kayla would set out on the road with MCR again.


	17. Chapter 16

**CHAPTER 16**

Kayla was miserable. She did not go backstage to watch the My Chemical Romance shows anymore. She hardly ever left the bus. Gerard stayed with her as much as he could, but she would get so lonely sitting by herself every night. Sometimes she would cry, sometimes she would punch the wall, but now she was developing a new way of dealing with her raging pregnancy hormones. She started writing. Sometimes she wrote song or poetry, sometimes she would write character sketches of random people from her head, sometimes she would just jot down a random phrase she liked. It really helped her get the anger our without getting the blood from her fists on the walls. However, she was sure that all this creative writing was going to cause her baby to come out in black eyeliner girl pants and an emo haircut. One day in her third pregnant month Kayla remembered she should go have an ultrasound to check on the baby. The guys were at a sound check and preparation for a show, so Kayla didn't see a point in telling Gerard, knowing she would be back before he was. She was in downtown in a city in Colorado, and earlier the bus had gone past a woman's free clinic, so she decided to go there and get it done quickly. She got off the bus when it dropped her off. She told the driver to just wait there; she would only be about a half hour. She walked into the very busy clinic and someone took her right away. She went into a dimly lit room with monitors, humming machines and an examination bed. She lay down and the doctor came in. _Thank God, it's a woman._ She thought to herself. She would not have been comfortable with a male doctor. The doctor came in with a big warm smile on her face.

"Hello..." she looked down at the chart "...Kayla is it? How are we today Kayla?"

"Pregnant. Need I say more?" laughed Kayla. "I really just want to see how the baby is." she said, rubbing her stomach.

"Well that's what I'm here for." said the doctor as she turned on the ultrasound machine.

"So Kayla tell me, how far along are we?"

"Um...about three months give or take a week or so." she said.

"Okay perfect, we're just going to see a clear baby." said the doctor, pulling out a bottle of gel. "Now I'm going to put this gel on your stomach, it helps the machine okay? It's going to be a little cold." the doctor rubbed the gel over Kayla's stomach and Kayla shuddered. _That stuff is freezing!_ She said to herself. Then the doctor pulled out the ultrasound tool and ran it over Kayla's stomach. Suddenly a picture popped up on the monitor. The doctor looked at the monitor, thought for a second, then said

"Okay...I can see a heartbeat there." she pointed to the screen. "See the pulsing fluctuation? That's the baby's heartbeat." Kayla giggled, that was her baby and its little heartbeat. "Okay, I see a head...I see two arms...I see...oh...oh..." Kayla got nervous.

"Doctor is there something wrong with my baby?" she asked, panicking slightly.

"Um...the baby's legs...they're slightly tangled, may cause some circulation problems...unless the baby can work itself into a better position...which there's a very good chance it will, mark my words its very very possible it can fix itself and there will be nothing to worry about...but then again...if it doesn't..." Kayla was very afraid now.

"Is my baby going to be okay?" the doctor closed her eyes and thought about how to answer Kayla.

"Maybe." she said, and Kayla began to cry.


	18. Chapter 17

**CHAPTER 17**

After Kayla got back to the bus from the clinic, she sat in her bunk, happy for the privacy. She cried until she had no tears left, she cried until her eyes were so swollen she couldn't see, she cried until the top half of her shirt was soaking wet, she cried until she just ran out of tears and her head went numb, she cried until the guys got back. She wiped the tears from her face and took a deep breath. She came out of her bunk and went to the front of the bus to meet the guys, wearing the biggest smile she could muster. Gerard came and brought her into a big hug.

"How are my two favorite people in the world?" he asked after he kissed her sweetly. He had started referring to Kayla as two people, because of the baby.

"We're...just perfect sweetie." said Kayla. _I can't tell him...I just can't. He will be so upset, he is so happy; I can't bring him down now can I? No that would be cruel. _She thought to herself. She decided not to tell Gerard about the problems with the baby, at least, not yet.

Later that night Kayla and Gerard were doing what they had gotten in the habit of doing. Gee would come up and sit with Kayla in her bunk, sitting up against the wall with Kayla against him. He would hug her and kiss her cheek and rub her stomach. Every few minutes he would whisper, "I love you" or "I'm so happy" in her ear. She would just sit there and listen to him breathe. Then he asked something Kayla was not entirely prepared for.

"So what do you want to name the baby?" he asked. Kayla thought for a second.

"I don't know. What do you think?" she said. She honestly had not given names any thought at all.

"Well I guess it depends on weather it's a girl or a boy"

"It's a girl." Kayla said quickly.

"How do you know that?" asked Gerard. Kayla stopped. Did she know? Yes, she knew. Somehow, she knew. Of course, she had asked the doctor, but it was too early to tell.

"I don't know, I just...know. It's a gut feeling you know?" she did not know what else to say.

"So I guess we're coming up with girl's names then." he said. His voice sounded different...not quite disappointed, but not exactly happy either. She was silent for a moment, and all of a sudden a name popped into her head.

"What about Rose?" she asked.

"Rose?" he asked. Kayla smiled. She loved the way it sounded when he said it. "I don't know. Hmm. Rose. Rose." he said it a few times over, trying to get his tongue around it. "I don't know if I like Rose...maybe...can I reserve the right to bring something up if I think of one?" Kayla thought

"Okay. Sure. Why not." How many other names could he possibly come up with anyhow? He went back to whispering in her ear.

"You know what I can't wait to do?" he asked. "I can't wait to take the baby for a walk in her carriage with you. You know, walk down the street or in a park with the baby, you know? Just like those perfect couples in the movies." That just broke Kayla. Tears leaked silently down her cheeks and she bit her lip to keep herself from making noise. She turned her head so her tears wouldn't hit him to alert him to her crying. She wasn't sure anymore about how long she was going to be able to cover this up. But she knew she couldn't much longer.


	19. Chapter 18

**CHAPTER 18**

Kayla hit her sixth pregnant month and Gerard insisted that they visit another clinic and find out for sure if it was a boy or a girl. They walked together into the clinic and Kayla was back on the table with the tool running over her stomach. She couldn't help but smile when she looked at the monitor and saw that tiny baby. Gerard squeezed her hand and smiled ear to ear, looking at the monitor too. The doctor was another woman and all of a sudden, her face was strange.

"Well it's definitely a girl." she said. Kayla looked at Gerard and said

"I told you so" as he bent down to kiss her gently.

"Mr. Way would you mind stepping outside for a moment? I'd like to talk to your wife alone for a moment." asked the doctor, still staring at the monitor. Gerard's face was filled with a mix of curiosity, disappointment, and confusion.

"Yeah, yeah okay. Kayla sweetie I'll be right outside okay?" he said, not letting go of her hand until her arm was at full length. He walked outside and closed the door behind him. As Gerard stood outside, leaning against the door he wondered what on earth was on the doctor's mind that he couldn't be in the room to hear. A thousand thoughts ran through his mind. Thoughts about if the baby was okay, if Kayla was okay. That's what he cared about most; Kayla. Of course, he cared about the baby too, but he wasn't attached to the baby, he was attached to Kayla. He stood there, back against the thick wooden door thinking for about ten minutes before he heard

"Okay Mr. Way you can come back in now." from the doctor. He walked back in to see Kayla in hysterical tears. He didn't think he'd ever seen her so upset in his whole time knowing her. He rushed to her side and took her in his arms. She sat in his warmth and cried for a few minutes, the doctor looking sympathetically at the pair. Once Kayla regained herself, she looked at Gerard and said

"The baby's going to be fine Gee. The baby's in perfect health." Gerard smiled widely, then his face fell again.

"If everything is fine then why are you crying so much?" he asked, rubbing some tears away with his thumb.

"I'm just...happy I guess." she said shrugging and putting on the biggest smile she could.

"Okay." he said, still slightly confused.

For the next month or so, Gerard could not shake this haze of depression that seemed to hang over Kayla all the time. She laughed, she kissed, she smiled, but they always seemed sort of half hearted. Every time he would ask her what the matter was, she would just smile and say

"Nothing" and it was usually followed by a kiss from her, just to nail it home that she was fine. Her 19th birthday passed without a word, but he did buy a teddy bear and leave it on her pillow. He watched her when she saw it. He saw her face light up for only a second. She saw the happy gleam in her eyes, and the smile of the Kayla he married. The face of the Kayla he saved, the one he fell in love with, the one from their wedding night. He saw it again, when she got that bear on her pillow, but it was gone in a second. However, it was enough for Gerard to smile too. She came over and gave him a big hug and he kissed her for a while. The baby was due in less than four weeks and he could not stop telling her how fantastic she was. He would sneak up behind her and wrap his arms around her stomach, he would kiss her, he would cook for her randomly, and sometimes he would just flat out tell her she was perfect. One night, they were doing a show and Kayla was in the bus, sitting in her bunk with the composition book she used for her writing when she was alone. She was crying her eyes out and writing something; a letter.

_Dear Gee, _

_I know you probably...well...definitely will hate me for this. I hope you understand that you were to happy about the baby for me to put this burden on you too..._

She wrote for the next half hour, crying, scratching words out and re-writing them. When she finally signed it, she was all cried out. Suddenly, she had a sharp pain in her stomach.

"Oh, oh, ow!" she squealed. Kayla clenched her stomach and waited out the pain, squirming in her bunk. When the pain subsided Kayla was struck with a panicked thought. _That was a contraction. Oh my God I'm having the baby. _She ran to the front of the bus and told the driver to stop the show. She needed to get to the hospital and wasn't going without Gerard. She never told him she loved him, she never told him so many things. She needed him there with her when she had the baby. The bus driver ran like crazy into the arena through the stage door. He came in right before MCR was ready to take the stage. He grabbed Gerard's shoulder, panting and out of breath.

"Gerard! It's Kayla! She's in the bus, she's having the baby. Come on Gerard we have to get to a hospital!" Gerard's jaw dropped and all six of them ran like hell back to the bus, leaving Reggie and the Full Effect and Alkaline Trio to deal with the screaming arena.

Back in the bus, driving like crazy, Gerard was sitting on a bunk with Kayla hugging her and letting her squeeze her hand whenever a contraction started. He winced, fearing she was actually going to break his hand, but he refused to let go for as long as he could feel his fingers. Once they pulled into the hospital circle they all ran out of the bus, but before she got off, Kayla slipped a folded piece of paper onto Gerard's bunk.


	20. Chapter 19

**CHAPTER 19**

Kayla was rushed into a delivery room. They put her in a hospital gown and set her down, ready for immediate delivery of a baby girl. Gerard changed into scrubs and after explaining that he was her husband, was admitted to the room to be by her side. He was shocked at how pale Kayla was all of a sudden. Her face was covered in sweat and her eyes were bloodshot and sunken. She was breathing heavily and crying a little. He ran to her and grabbed her hand.

"Gee, honey, I don't think I can do it." she panted.

"Don't say that Kayla you're going to be fine. You said yourself the baby was perfectly healthy, we have nothing to worry about."

"Gee...oh Gee I'm so sorry." she said, squinting the tears out of her eyes. Gerard was confused, and suddenly he thought he understood. He was about to say something, but then the doctor's voice broke his concentration.

"Kayla is it? Okay Kayla how are we today? Ready to have a baby?" Kayla moaned and motioned for the doctor to come closer. She whispered something in his ear. Gerard couldn't hear what she said, but the doctor's face fell as soon as she said it. "Oh, okay then. Kayla...I'm sorry. But if that is the choice you've made..." he looked at Gerard then took his place near Kayla's legs, ready to help deliver the baby.

"Okay Kayla get ready to push, I see the head!" he said. Gerard took Kayla's hand and wiped the hair off her face. She scrunched up her face as she strained to push the baby out. She whispered with the energy she could

"Gee, honey take care of the baby okay? Please?"

"Kayla WE'RE going to take good care of the baby honey why are you talking like this is the end of the world or something?" Gerard was seriously panicking. Was there something he didn't know? Something Kayla hadn't told him? Was there something wrong with the baby?

"Kayla come on. We're going to have the baby and we're going to be one of those perfect couples with their baby in the carriage walking through the park remember? Just like we said we would? Come on Kayla you got to pull through for that. For the baby, for me..."

Gerard was fighting back tears at that point. He refused to cry. He had to be strong for Kayla. She strained and pushed again at the doctor's coaxing.

"Gee, promise me that you're going to move on. Get another girlfriend, keep making music, don't linger on me forever please Gee. Please." Gerard shook his head violently.

"NO Kayla I'm going to linger on you forever because you're leaving this hospital with me okay! Kayla you me and this baby are all leaving this hospital together! As a family! Come on Kayla we can't be a family without you!"

"Gee I'm sorry." she whispered and pushed again.

"I see a head..." said the doctor. "Keep pushing Kayla, here she comes." Kayla pushed again, and this time she let out a low moan that built into a scream. Suddenly her scream was lost with a second, a cry, a baby's cry. Suddenly Kayla went silent, save for her heavy breathing. Gerard looked from the baby in the nurse's arms to Kayla's pained, twisted face. The baby's cries were deafening.

"Is that...is that my baby crying?" she whispered to Gerard.

"Yeah Kayla, yeah it is." said Gerard, rubbing her arm and smiling. "Honey see you're okay. You had the baby and you're fine see?" Kayla laughed a little and then said

"Tell her I love her. Every day tell her I love her. Don't let the baby forget that I love her. Make sure she never forgets..." Gerard stopped her, not willing to listen to her saying that

"No Kayla I won't remind her because you can do it yourself. Because you are going to be there when she wakes up every morning and when she goes to bed every night. Kayla you are going to be there okay? Come on, I can't live without you!"

"You're going to have to Gee. Please. Just make sure she knows who I was, and that I love her. And NOT loved! Love. Okay? Just because I'm not there doesn't mean I don't love her and let her know that. Promise me that Gee!" Tears leaked down his face, unable to deny her.

"Okay. I swear to you right now she won't forget you love her. I swear." he bent down and kissed her forehead.

"I love you Gerard Way. I always will." she whispered, smiling a little. Gerard couldn't help himself, he let out a sob.

"I love you more than life itself Kayla. I really do. And I always will okay?"

"Okay." she said. Suddenly her chest stopped heaving, her breathing slowed, and her eyes closed gently. "I love you." he barely heard her. He almost didn't thanks to all the people and machines around him. Suddenly, she stopped completely. Her chest stopped moving, her eyelids stopped fluttering, her tears stopped flowing. Gerard leaned over and put his head on her chest, looking for a heartbeat. He remembered all the times she had listened to his, and cried at the thought that he never got to hear hers, because when he put his head down, her body was silent and still. She was still a little warm, so he kept his head there staring at the nurse with the baby, as she took her out of the room. He jumped up

"Where are you taking her?!" he asked, rushing over and trying to take his daughter. The nurse replied

"We need to keep her overnight for observation, make sure she's alright. Its okay, you can come see her in the incubator room in a few minutes, once I get her settled I will come for you alright?" she gave him a sympathetic look and walked down the hallway with the crying baby. The baby who would never feel the arms of her mother.

Gerard stood above the little box his baby was in. She looked like she was in a little fish tank. He didn't really know what to do. Frank, Ray, Mikey, and Bob had sat with him in the waiting room, hugging him as he cried. He loved them so much, willing to sacrifice their own masculinity to be seen hugging him as he cried. They were still out there waiting for him, they were all going to spend the night with him in that waiting room, there was no way Gerard was leaving the baby alone in the hospital. He stood over the little clear box and put his hand over it. For lack of knowing what else to do, he talked to her.

"Hey...hey there. I...I'm your daddy." he said jerkily "I don't know what to tell you other than I'm sorry. I know I'm not going to be able to raise you half as well as I would with your mommy. She was great you know that? No, of course you don't, how would you? I mean she's...she's..." Gerard choked back more tears. "Wow you must think I'm a wimp don't you? A grown man crying like a baby in front of his newborn...oh God, you're my newborn aren't you. Wow. I'm a father now I guess. And I have you to thank for it I suppose. And your mother. Kayla. She loves you you know. She really loves you. She went through hell to get you out here, and she went to heaven for it. I tell you one thing right now baby girl, if you grow up to be anything, grow up to be like your mother. Okay? Yeah, you're mother was a piece of work let me tell you that. She was beautiful, she was smart, she had a soul, she knew what she wanted out of life..." he wiped a tear from his eye as Kayla's smile entered his mind. "She didn't live as long as she deserved to she really didn't. The world needed your mommy and she didn't get to do enough. But she did change my life. And you're uncle Mikey's life, and Frank, and Bob, and Ray. They're all your uncles too I guess, we're all brothers. Yeah you're mom was going to fix the world, she just never had time. They took her before she was ready to go I suppose. But mark my words baby, I'm going to take care of you. No way I'm letting anything bad happen to you. Never. You have my promise now that you will never need to be afraid. As long as I live, you never need to worry about a thing." Just then a nurse walked in.

"Mr. Way?"

"yes?" he said, looking up from the baby.

"We need to register your daughter's name. Have you picked one out for her? I could come back later if you need more time..."

"No that's fine I know what her name is." said Gerard scratching his head. "Her name is...her name is Rose. Rose Kayla Way." as soon as the name rolled out of his mouth he knew why Kayla had wanted to name the baby Rose. It really sounded perfect with Way on the end of it. And as for the middle name, that was one of the ways he was going to make sure Kayla was never really forgotten...


	21. Chapter 20

**CHAPTER 20**

The next day Gerard was told that the Rose was fine and could go home. Holding her for the first time was a little bittersweet. She was so tiny, so fragile, and so beautiful she was unmistakably Kayla's baby. However, at the same time Gerard was so afraid. How was he ever going to raise her right without Kayla? This girl was going to come out as the biggest tomboy ever, raised by five guys. No way was this going to work. But what choice did he have? He walked with Rose and the guys back out to the bus. Gerard placed her gently in Mikey's arms so he could climb up into his bunk. Mikey handed Rose up to him and he sat with her. He shifted around then heard a crunch, a crackle, like paper. He set Rose gently down and reached under him to pull out the folded paper he had sat on. He opened it and tears fell as he recognized Kayla's handwriting.

_Dear Gee,_

_I know you probably...well...definitely will hate me for this. I hope you understand that you were too happy about the baby for me to put this burden on you too. Gee, one day back when I was three months pregnant I went to a clinic to check the baby without telling you. They told me that the baby's legs were tangled up, but it might fix itself, nothing to worry about. That's why I didn't bother telling you. I didn't want you worried over what might be nothing. But when we went when I was six months along...oh Gee I'm so sorry. When she sent you out of the room the doctor told me that the baby had moved and was in a perfectly healthy position, for her. The baby had damaged my body instead of its own. The doctor told me that if I had the baby there was a chance I would die. A good chance too. Then she told me that we could abort the baby and have surgery to fix me and I would be fine. I thought about that, and then remembered how happy you are about the baby. How can I take that away from you? Gee, there's a chance of me dying but there's a chance of me living. If I am meant to die to give this baby a life then I will. If we are meant to be together forever then we will be. We will be. I will admit I'm a little afraid. I don't really want to die, but I know that if I'm meant to I have to. Just know that I love you Gerard Way. Just know that okay? If you don't take me out of that hospital, take your knowledge of my love. Wow, my stomach really hurts. Baby doesn't want me getting all mushy on you now. We have a hardcore baby Gee! You are going to make a great father. Never forget you are a great father okay Gee? Well I'm going to stop writing now, my stomach's really starting to hurt._

_I love you,_

_Kayla_

It was raining. _Of course, it was raining; it was a funeral it should be raining_. Thought Gerard. He stood outside the door of the church, arms crossed, leaning against the wall with Rose in his arms. He nodded to people as they entered the church for the service. Kayla's coffin lay open in the front of the church, she looked very peaceful, but Gerard was avoiding her body, not sure if he would be able to take it. Then, out of nowhere, Kayla's parents walked up the stairs. Of course, he had called them to tell them their daughter had died, but he did not tell them about the funeral. _Mikey_. He thought to himself. _That righteous do gooder Mikey. He called them. _Thought Gerard. He wanted to jump in front of them and bar their path, but then realized that their daughter was in there, and he couldn't stop them as they went through the door. They stopped and looked at him tentatively. He just stood there, back against the open door, holding the sleeping baby, staring stone-faced at them. Once they realized he had nothing to say, Mr. and Mrs. Rogers went through the doors and took a seat near the back. Once everyone came inside Gerard went in, pulling the doors closed behind him. He walked in total silence up the isle and handed the baby gently over to Frank. He went up the few steps and took his place behind the pulpit. He surveyed the crowd of black clad friends and family members, some crying some just sitting there staring at him or the coffin. He himself looked at Kayla's body for a second, but then closed his eyes and turned away, to keep himself from crying before he absolutely had to.

"Well, thanks everyone for coming I guess." he said, unsure of what else to tell them. Everyone said he should have written down some thoughts but he knew he just had to speak from his heart. "Kayla would have appreciated knowing she had this many people who loved her. Wow, would have. As in, she doesn't now. It's really still hitting me that she's gone you know? She was so perfect and I loved her so much it seemed like the world wouldn't be right if she wasn't there. Kayla was one of those people who was going to change the world. She wasn't supposed to get taken away this early. Our karma must really suck to have lost her. But, Rose...Rose is the perfect baby to me. She doesn't cry in the night, she eats everything and doesn't spit anything out. She's as perfect as Kayla was. I told Rose back when we were still in the hospital that if she's going to be like anyone in this life it's her mother. I guess she heard me right? She sacrificed her own life to bring Rose to me, I still don't quite grasp why, but she did. She thought the baby could make me happier than she could. I really wonder where she got that idea. But she was always putting me and the guys first. She listened before she talked, she gave the seconds before she took firsts, and she was always satisfied with what wasn't even close to enough. Then she goes and marries me! She married me. Can you believe that? I don't even compare to her in anything. Well, no, I beat her in one thing. She may have loved me with all her heart and I believe she did...does...but I loved her more. No matter what I loved her more. More than anyone in this room. I am never going to be able to move on. She actually told me to move on can you believe that? She told me to keep singing, get a new girlfriend, the works. She didn't want to leave a scar. That's how much she cared. I swear if you slit her throat, she would use her last breath to apologize for dripping blood on the floor for you to clean up. I guess I don't have a whole lot else to say..." he looked around at the people, disappointed in himself. He was out of words and he had not nearly done his wife justice. Suddenly he remembered what he had wanted to do. He walked down to her coffin and pulled a folded piece of notebook paper out of his back pocket. On it, he had written the lyrics to "Demolition Lovers". Then he tentatively reached down with the paper and placed it open on her chest. Then he reached down and followed her arm down to her hand, which he lifted, and found what he was looking for. Yes, the wedding ring was still on her finger. He gently set her hand down over the paper on her chest.

"Just checking," he said. He wanted Kayla buried with her ring, and he wanted to be buried with his. No one freaked when he touched Kayla's corpse. He thought someone would, but he guessed they all understood. He went back to Frank and took Rose from his arms. This little piece of Kayla still here with him.


	22. epilague

**ELIPAGUE**

The day after the funeral Gerard was sitting on the edge of his bed, back home in New Jersey. Rose's crib was feet from his bed and he was just staring at it. Upstairs he could hear the snores or Frank, Ray, Bob, and Mikey. They had been refusing to leave him lately. _They're probably afraid I'll slit my wrists or hang myself in the night if they leave._ He thought bitterly to himself. He glanced at his alarm clock as it turned to 5:00 am. He bowed his head and ran his fingers through his hair furiously, as if trying to root out Kayla's memory. Gerard knew he had to get on with his life; Kayla would be so upset if he knew how much she was weighing on his mind. He stood up and pulled on a black t-shirt and a leather jacket. He pulled Rose out of her cradle and brought her upstairs, setting her down gently in Mikey's bed for her to be safe while he was gone. Gerard slipped into his sneakers and grabbed his car keys. It was a bit of a drive, but he had time before the guys woke up...

He stood outside the cold black bars of the cemetery gates and took a deep breath. Hands in his pockets he strode through the lines of graves, looking at the tombstones and admiring some of the sculptures on the fancy ones. Finally, he got to Kayla's spot. He just stood there for a minute, looking at it. Then slowly he sat down on the grass. He ran his finger softly over the cold stone, tracing the letters in her name. _Kayla Jean Way_. He traced her last name a few more times, remembering all the things they had shared. He had so much to say to her. He wanted her to hear him so much. He moved so he was lying down in the grass, face pressed against the dirt, hands digging into the grass. He closed his eyes as tears leaked out, soaking into the ground.

"Hey. Hey Kayla its me. Gee. I found your letter. I could never hate you, you know that. You said I was going to hate you but how could you possibly think that? Kayla I loved you and I still do. I'm a little upset that you didn't feel like you could tell me, but I could never have been angry at you for it. You shouldn't have been taken away. Someone goofed up because we were supposed to be together forever. The signals got crossed somewhere and they took you instead." he paused, suddenly angry.

"But why? Why Kayla? Why did you let them take you? You were supposed to stay here with me and Rose! We were supposed to be perfect, we...we...oh god." he pounded the ground with his fist, then started sobbing. "I miss you so much. I'm afraid to wake up every morning at the thought that you're not waking up next to me anymore. Every day is just another chance for me to screw up now, because you're not here to help me. I know you told me to move on, but moving on would be so much easier if there was another you to move on to. I guess that doing the best I can with Rose is all I can do. You sacrificed yourself to bring Rose to me, I won't let you down. I refuse to let your sacrifice go in vain okay? Okay?" he just lay there for god knows how long. At one point he fell asleep, but woke up very quickly at the sound of a passing car. That's when he knew it was time to leave. He stood up slowly and walked towards the cemetery gate. As he walked towards his car he looked up at the sky. The sun was coming up on a blue sky and Gerard swore he saw Kayla's smile in the clouds as he drove away.

**THE END**


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